Passively watching the Pro Bowl is the football equivalent of the Masters for napping

The Pro Bowl really was like... The football equivalent of the Masters in terms of a great nap day, like a wonderful nap Sunday was watching neither offense or defensive line really get out of the three-point stances at all.

The Rams must win a Super Bowl in the next two years before their seven-year lack of first-round picks catches up to them

The Rams' window feels like it's pretty small here, and they have to kind of win a Super Bowl in the next two years before the fact that they haven't had a first-round draft pick in seven years is going to catch up.

The Matthew Stafford trade lowered the market price for Deshaun Watson

Judging off my newfound expertise in the stock market, they'll look at this as being like, wow, that's one less buyer that we could have. So I guess the price is going down on Deshaun.

The Bills could have three or four Super Bowls without kickers

You can make the argument that the Buffalo Bills would have like three or four Super Bowls if kickers weren't a thing in football. You can make the argument that the Patriots might not have had the start of that dynasty if it wasn't for kickers.

Jalen Hurts will answer the Titans by beating them as a passer

I actually think Jalen Hurts is good enough as a quarterback that when somebody dares him to do that, he could say, 'Fuck you, I will beat you as a quarterback.' And then stay in the pocket and throw for like 300 yards and three touchdowns.

The Jaguars would be the second-best team in football if they win in Denver

If they win this game in Denver, I would put them maybe second in the power rankings behind the Jets.