The Celtics will win the NBA title on Friday night

I'm gonna say right now, the [Celtics] are gonna win on Friday night. I don't know if that's a fact, but I feel like they're the better team. Well, that's a fact. They are the better team. And the Mavs have quit.

The Celtics are a perfect team with no holes

More than just Luca's defense, it's just more of a testament to the Celtics having no holes. They don't have a guy who can—you can sag off of. They don't have a guy that you can basically say we're gonna ignore them. They don't have a guy that you can put your worst defender on and say he's gonna be okay.

LeBron James is just a Brian Windhorst merchant

I would make the argument that LeBron is just a [Brian Windhorst] merchant that [Windhorst] made LeBron not the other way around.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.