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Void
Nov 7, 2018
#6185
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Jerry Jones is no longer making the calls for the Cowboys

Jerry Jones is not making the calls anymore. I think he's a figurehead right now. He's the emperor with no clothes... Steven Jones, he's taken over the kingdom from his father. It's like at the end of Braveheart where the old guy's dying and the son's making the calls.

While Stephen Jones took on more responsibility, Jerry Jones remains the official GM and face of the franchise's decisions.

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Loss
Nov 7, 2018
#6184
Big CatBig Cat

The Cowboys stink and Jerry Jones has no idea what is going on anymore

The Cowboys stink. And Jerry Jones is either dead or has no idea what's going on anymore. He actually has changed the narrative on everyone because he's so scared of firing Jason Garrett and not having full control of his team.

The Cowboys actually turned their season around shortly after this, finishing 10-6 and winning a playoff game, though the Jason Garrett era did eventually end due to the stagnation Big Cat mentions.
Win
Nov 7, 2018
#28236
Big CatBig Cat

LeBron James will eventually get Luke Walton fired from the Lakers

LeBron [James] will get Luke Walton fired, and you'll bounce back there.

Luke Walton was fired by the Lakers on April 12, 2019, shortly after the end of the regular season.
Win
Nov 7, 2018
#6187
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Titans should not have signed Malcolm Butler

Malcolm Butler fucking stinks. He's so bad. He's been terrible. [Bill Belichick] duped over his own former player. You are the Titans, yes. You should not have signed Malcolm Butler.

Butler had a very poor start to his Titans career in 2018, though he eventually improved. At the time of the take, he was statistically one of the worst-performing corners.

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Open
Nov 2, 2026
#31796
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
Nov 2, 2026
#31800
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
Nov 2, 2026
#31802
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.