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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Jim Irsay is a hero for being the NFL owner who finally catalyzed the removal of Dan Snyder

Major shout out to Jim Irsay because who would've ever thought that Jim Irsay would've been the one that got this ball rolling when he sat in the golf cart smoking a cigarette outside the owner's meeting saying, 'I think the time has come to do something about Dan Snyder.' ... He's a hero. Thank you sir.

Jim Irsay's public comments in October 2022 were widely credited by NFL insiders as the first real crack in Snyder's armor among the ownership group.

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Win
Jul 21, 2023
#20045
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

A $60 million fine will not teach Dan Snyder or other NFL owners a lesson

[Dan Snyder] is paying a 60 million fine on his way out the door... which hilariously reduces the value of the team to 5.9 billion. So that'll teach him a lesson. He only made 5.1 billion profit off this sale. So owners will think twice before fooling around with the books.

Snyder was fined $60 million following the Mary Jo White investigation, but he did indeed profit billions on the sale, making the fine negligible in the grand scheme.
Void
Jul 21, 2023
#22966
Big CatBig Cat

If I owned an NFL team, I would absolutely override my scouts to draft players based on 'vibes'

If I were, if I owned a team, I'd be like, you know, they'd have a draft board. I'd be like, no, that guy lost me money in a College Bowl game. That guy like, yeah, he's pretty sick. And I would definitely put my foot down and be like, I want that guy... understand I watched him once and it was awesome.

This is a subjective statement about Big Cat's hypothetical management style.
Void
Jul 21, 2023
#20047
Big CatBig Cat

The Colts' new 'Indiana Nights' uniforms are the ugliest in the NFL

The Colts' new uniforms today... it's hard to fuck up a uniform release. The Colts did it. They are the ugliest uniforms. I mean, good try guys, but they look like cops.

While subjective, the uniforms were widely mocked on social media for looking like high school or 'Duke' uniforms.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.