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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Maxx Crosby to the Ravens is a great move that makes their defense scary

Congrats to the Ravens. Congrats to Jesse Minter. This is a good, a great move. Their defense is gonna be scary. I love the transition from Maxx Crosby was always meant to be playing in a badass uniform. Raiders to Ravens, it's like, okay.

The Crosby-to-Ravens trade was real when this episode aired, and the defensive fit was sound. However, the trade was rescinded days later due to a failed physical.

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Void
Mar 9, 2026
#29856
Big CatBig Cat

The Ravens are abandoning their draft-and-develop philosophy because they've drafted poorly lately

The Ravens feel like the team for however long, I mean, pretty much their entire history, it's like what they do is they draft really well. They don't have to do these type of moves. And then they do this move... maybe the Ravens haven't drafted as well recently. So now they do have to join everyone else and be these guys.

Subjective analysis of team building strategy.
Open
Mar 9, 2026
#29870
Big CatBig Cat

The Ravens have a three-to-four-year window with Lamar Jackson to go all in and win a Super Bowl

Are the Ravens basically saying Lamar Jackson, he's 29, he's got, we got like a three, four year window where we're gonna have to go all in here? You're kind of forking the road. Are you trying to keep your draft capital to keep reloading around Lamar Jackson? You're like, 'Hey, let's go win this right now.'

The Ravens' success in this window depends on winning a Super Bowl before Lamar Jackson hits his 30s.
Void
Mar 9, 2026
#29857
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Cowboys 'monitoring' every situation is just a facade for doing nothing

Thoughts and prayers to the Dallas Cowboys who are now leading the NFL in number of guys that they're monitoring... they've been monitoring every situation. So they were monitoring the Crosby situation extremely closely. And they're very disappointed that they did not get Maxx Crosby, despite the fact that they're monitoring.

It's a satirical take on the Cowboys' lack of action in free agency/trades.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.