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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Roger Goodell is depressed because the new CBA took away his hobby of collecting urine samples.

I think Roger Goodell is depressed because in the CBA they gave up his rights to go collect piss from everybody. That's like his hobby. That's like taking away that one week of fishing that Nick Saban does every year.

This is a purely comedic claim based on the changes to drug testing in the 2020 CBA.

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Win
Apr 24, 2020
#15166
Big CatBig Cat

Mike Vrabel won the night for best NFL Draft home setup.

Mike Vrabel clearly won the night in his room. He had a guy that looked like a mix between the Waterboy Adam Sandler and Joe Dirt. The other was taking a shit. I believe he's sitting on a Barstool intentionally looking like he's making sure in my professional opinion.

This was a widely agreed-upon sentiment on social media during the draft night.
Void
Apr 24, 2020
#15164
Big CatBig Cat

The gap between Tua Tagovailoa and Justin Herbert is massive.

The smoke of Justin Herbert jumping Tua [Tagovailoa] was making me so mad because Tua is so much better than Justin Herbert. No offense, Justin Herbert. He might end up being good but Tua is control good and the gap between Joe Burrow and Tua is miniscule. The gap between Tua and Justin Herbert is massive.

While subjective, Justin Herbert won Offensive Rookie of the Year and statistically outpaced Tua in several early seasons, making this highly debatable if not arguably incorrect based on early career trajectories.
Void
Apr 24, 2020
#21818
Big CatBig Cat

Roger Goodell was definitely drunk during the first night of the 2020 NFL Draft.

Let's talk about Goodell for a second. Is he okay? Because no, he was drunk. How is he that bad at talking in his living room when all you had to do was like two lines every 10 minutes? He was sluggish, he was not pronouncing words correctly, he was turning red in the face. He changed outfits to get more comfortable halfway through. He tried to hug Caesar Ruiz through his television. He saw a big dude getting drafted and was like 'this is the guy I gotta give the bro hug to.'

While Goodell's performance was widely mocked for being awkward and low-energy, there is no proof he was actually intoxicated.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Knicks will probably win the series in five games or even sweep the Cavs

I still think that the, the Knicks are probably gonna win in five. They could even pull off the sweep. I guess the only real question we have for you, 'cause we already, we declared that the New York Knicks have won the series after game one. Correct.

The series is currently ongoing with the Knicks leading 2-0.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The NBA should rebrand the 'granny shot' as the 'pimp grip' to encourage players to use it

Nobody, no player in the NBA wants to shoot a free throw granny style. But if it's pimp grip, that sounds pretty fucking cool. Listen, if it goes in, it doesn't matter. Like if he and he would, he actually probably get some endorsements from it.

This is a comedic suggestion and not a verifiable fact claim.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I want the Thunder to win so we can love Victor Wembanyama longer before the inevitable hate cycle starts

I know who I want to win. I want the Thunder to win this series. And the reason why I want the thunder to win this series is because I think if the thunder win, we get to restart the clock on how much longer we get to love Weby before we hate 'em. If the Spurs win this series and then they win their first championship and Weby dominates, we're gonna eventually hate Weby.

The outcome of the series is pending, and the 'hate cycle' is a subjective sociological prediction.