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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Steve Kerr is benching Jayson Tatum to sabotage the Celtics' team chemistry

Maybe Steve Kerr is trying to stop the dynasty before it starts. It would be awesome if Steve Kerr was just trying to fuck with the Celtics' chemistry right now and just piss off their star player.

This is a humorous conspiracy theory and cannot be proven as Kerr's actual intent.

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Push
Jul 29, 2024
#8947
Big CatBig Cat

I am already talking myself into 10 wins for almost every NFL team

The social media from the first weekend of the NFL being back is awesome because every team you think that you're gonna be like 10 wins. I can talk myself into 10 wins for any team except for maybe, maybe not the Panthers.

The Panthers finished with 2 wins in 2024, proving his hesitation correct. Most other teams did not reach 10 wins.
Void
Jul 29, 2024
#8948
HankHank

Steve Kerr is a piece of shit for not playing Jason Tatum

Steve Kerr is a piece of shit. That's, that's really what this all boils down to. Jason Tatum did have a better plus minus than Joel Embiid. So there's that.

The take is a subjective opinion on Kerr's character/coaching. Tatum did indeed have a 0 plus-minus while Embiid was negative.
Loss
Jul 29, 2024
#8949
HankHank

Joel Embiid is the worst player in the entire Olympics

[Joel Embiid] is the worst player on the fucking team, probably in the whole Olympics.

Embiid went on to play much better as the tournament progressed and helped Team USA win gold.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.