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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Jaguars will win the AFC South if they run the table

Week 18, that's gonna be an awesome one. Yes, it could—that might be for all the marbles for the division. If the Jaguars run the table, they're gonna be in the playoffs.

The Jaguars did run the table, winning their final five games including a Week 18 win over the Titans to clinch the division.

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Win
Dec 19, 2022
#6525
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Jeff Saturday should be fired as the Colts interim head coach

Jeff Saturday, I like Jeff Saturday, seems like a good guy, he should probably be fired as interim head coach.

Jeff Saturday was not retained as the head coach after the season; the Colts hired Shane Steichen.
Win
Dec 19, 2022
#24302
Big CatBig Cat

The Vikings will be 'frauds' in January, but fans should enjoy the ride now

I wanna fess up to Vikings fans... at the end of the day we will be right [about them being frauds], but we don't have to keep talking about how we will be right... I need to just let you guys enjoy the ride. They're a fun team. Very fun. We can just leave [the fraud talk] aside and bring it back up in the playoffs.

The Vikings finished 13-4 with a negative point differential and lost at home in the Wild Card round to the Giants, proving Big Cat right.
Win
Dec 19, 2022
#6530
Big CatBig Cat

The Detroit Lions are officially a good football team

Lions 20, Jets 17. The Lions are good. The Lions are good. They're winning games all types of ways. They've covered six straight games for the first time since the Super Bowl was invented. They are a fun team.

The Lions finished the season 9-8 and went on to win the NFC North and reach the NFC Championship the following season.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.