Golf needs an asshole like Patrick Reed

I love Patrick Reed. I do love this man. He is a basic bitch. He's a man baby. On the golf course. He's a man baby. He's amazing. Yes, he's an asshole, but golf needs an asshole.

Ricky Fowler cannot win a major wearing a 'candy-ass' uniform on Sunday

I also feel bad for Sergio... I mean, we've long stood, you know, the Miami Dolphins, the Oregon Ducks. Teams that wear candy-ass uniforms in big-time moments, they just aren't as intimidating. And Ricky went with the creamsicle today, and I like Ricky. But I'm thinking maybe on Sundays in the majors, he needs to tone it down a little. You can wear the candy-ass uniforms after you bring home a title.

Tiger Woods played in an era with shitty golfers who didn't play defense

I think it's almost time to have the conversation of, like, did Tiger Woods just play in an era with shitty golfers? And now the new generation is way better than Tiger Woods ever was. Like you put Jordan Spieth back in the 2009 Masters... When the course didn't play defense at all. He played in the dead ball era.

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.