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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The media will turn on Joe Burrow if he doesn't win a Super Bowl in the next few years

If the Bengals go deep in the playoffs, like let's say the next two to three seasons and they don't win a Super Bowl... they're gonna attack 'em. It's gonna be like, 'don't you know cigars are bad for you?'... Peyton Manning and A-Rod were the biggest chokers of all time until they won.

The media has indeed turned on Joe Burrow to some extent. The Bengals went 9-8 in 2024, missing the playoffs. While Burrow put up good individual stats, the team hasn't won a Super Bowl, and there's been increasing scrutiny of whether the Bengals can build a winner around him.

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Win
Jan 16, 2023
#6819
Big CatBig Cat

Brock Purdy is the future for the 49ers and will start over Trey Lance next year.

I don't know how Trey Lance is gonna come back and take that job from Brock Purdy. The way that Brock Purdy's playing, he's playing as good as you can possibly hope. I think Brock Purdy's the future for the 49ers.

Brock Purdy remained the starter for the 49ers, and Trey Lance was traded to the Dallas Cowboys in August 2023.
Loss
Jan 16, 2023
#24005
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I would like to see Geno Smith return to the Jets because he would be a great fit there.

Geno Smith is worth more to the Seahawks than he'd be worth for any other franchise out there. ... the only one that I would like to see Geno Smith go back to more, I would like to see him go back to the Jets. ... I actually think that he'd be a good fit on the Jets.

Geno Smith signed a three-year contract extension with the Seahawks in March 2023, effectively ending any chance of a return to the Jets at that time.
Win
Jan 16, 2023
#6821
Big CatBig Cat

Brock Purdy is the best Mr. Irrelevant of all time

I'll say this and I have no idea who else is on this list. I'm gonna say right now. Brock Purdy Best Mr. Irrelevant of all time. He's one of one, the best Mr. Irrelevant.

Purdy has since made multiple Pro Bowls and a Super Bowl; no other Mr. Irrelevant has come close to his success as a starting QB.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.