Taking deferred money like Bobby Bonilla is a better deal than a lump sum payment.

Bobby Bonilla has an awesome contract... the more MLB TV rights deals start to come in, the more you're seeing players push off and say, 'yeah, I'll take some deferred money coming down the line.' It's a good deal. It's like when that scratch-off Millions for life or whatever it is... I would absolutely take a deal like that instead of giving me all the money straight up.

I would rather take $1 million a year for 25 years than $20 million upfront because I would spend the lump sum on jet skis.

If you were to say like, PFT, I'm going to give you either twenty million dollars on your 25th birthday or I'm going to give you a million dollars a year until you're 50, I'm absolutely taking the million until 50. Because if I'm 25, I'm just going to spend it like Billy Football would—just a shitload of jet skis, essentially just my own jet ski farm.

Deferred generational contracts like $50k a year for 75 years would just make your grandkids lazy pieces of shit.

What if you just got like fifty thousand dollars a year for the next like however long it be 75 years... all that would be ensuring is that your grandchildren are going to be like the laziest pieces of shit ever because they'll be like, 'I get my four thousand dollars a year coming in every July 1st. I don't need to get a job.'

Nate Oats would not be a great fit at UNC

I don't think he'd be a great fit there. Would people be talking about Nate Oats as much for this job if he didn't wear those jackets? They feel like Carolina jackets. It feels like he's been accepting people into anticipating him being the next UNC coach for a while.

James Wood will be a monster this season and hit 35 plus home runs

The only thing I have to look forward to this season is James Wood just being a fucking monster and getting 35 plus home runs. That's the only thing that I'm going to this season looking forward to as a Nats fan.

Tom Brady never processed 9/11 because he was such a psycho about football

He just had delayed onset grief. Anything that happened during his playing career, he never processed any of it outside of football. Tom Brady probably never processed 9/11. He was such a psycho, all he cared about was football. He probably found out about it like two years ago.