Takes

I officially enjoy golfing and believe it is a fun sport

I actually enjoyed golfing and that is my fire fest. It's a fun sport. Like we had a very good time... it suck, we had such a good time. I feel bad even saying this... I enjoyed it.

I can win the Internet Invitational golf tournament

I shot a 44 on the front today. I'm telling you guys, I think I can win the Internet Invitational. I think I can.

The broomstick putter is superior for putting but makes the user look like a douche bag

I was putting as, as good as I ever have and I've just been battling wrestling with myself on if I'm gonna actually use it in real life... understandably so people are gonna be like, that guy is the biggest douche bag of all time... but I at least have to feel it out.

I am officially quitting golf and never want to look at a club again

I quit golf last week after a strenuous round that I played with Henry... I don't know if you guys have ever experienced this, but you get so bad during a round or so bad at something that you just completely mentally break and you're like, I never wanna look at a golf club again.

I will break 85 in golf by July

Break 85. That's my goal by... By July.

I will shoot an 84 in my first golf round of the year

I'll shoot 80. I guarantee I shoot 84 first round out this year.

I will become a scratch golfer by the end of the week

I'm gonna become a scratch golfer by the end of the week.

I won't buy a golf bag until I break 130

I'm building myself up like a video game character in golf where I'm not allowing myself to get a golf bag until I break 130. That means that I'm carrying around a full set of clubs whenever I go to golf anywhere... I've literally taken a belt and I've wrapped it around my golf clubs and tightened it to keep them all together.

I would be just as good at golf with only three clubs

I don't think that I would be significantly worse at golf if I only had a driver, a seven iron and a putter. I don't think I would shave any strokes off my game by incorporating irons three through six.

Olympic drug testing will expose golfers with suspicious size increases

The Olympics are coming up around the corner... guess what sport is also in the Olympics and they're starting to do the eligibility for? Golf. So you know, if you see any like discrepancies in people's drive [and] their size compared to their size maybe two years ago... They don't drug test in the PGA. [The IOC tests] are pretty hard.

The Bryson DeChambeau vs. Brooks Koepka rivalry is exactly what golf needs to be interesting

I'm fine with this. I'm glad that there's a rivalry in golf. We needed something like this. The Tiger-Phil just doesn't do it for me... today was actually one of the first times that I've been watching golf and I've been more excited to watch somebody else besides Tiger.