Takes

Wisconsin women's ice hockey winning 5 out of 7 national titles is a dynasty

Women's ice hockey because the Wisconsin Badgers won another national title, five in seven years. Dynasty. Five and seven years is crazy. That's a dynasty.

Jonathan Toews signing with the Winnipeg Jets is the perfect way for him to end his career

Jonathan Toews. He's back, he signed with the Winnipeg Jets, his hometown team. ... I'm happy he's able to now play again. Hopefully end his career the right way. 'cause it really sucked the way it ended in Chicago.

The Oilers will win the Stanley Cup in seven games

I think it's Oilers. I got Oilers in seven. I think it's Oilers.

The Florida Panthers will win the Stanley Cup in five games

I'll go Panthers in five.

Patrick Kane is the greatest American hockey player of all time

The [Patrick] Kane moment was incredible. It was like, he's everything. He's the best American hockey player. He is fucking three cups. Like he's just showtime. Big moment after big moment.

The Colorado Avalanche will win the Stanley Cup

I've got the B's avalanche. I'll go with you on the Avalanche Hank. I've got back to back. [Vegas] I've got the avalanche.

Winning the Presidents' Trophy in hockey is a curse that leads to first-round exits

The Presidents' Trophy in hockey I think is a bad thing though. I will say that. Like, that is something I'm worried about. Just, you know, as day one on the bandwagon, it's like, do you really want to be flaunting the Presidents' Trophy in everyone's face like Capitals' fans used to do and then they lose in the first round? That might be bad.

The NHL should thank Tom Wilson for making the league relevant right now

If anything, the NHL should be thanking Tom Wilson for making the game relevant right now because people are talking about it.

The Washington Capitals will win the 2020 Stanley Cup

My who's back of the week is the Washington Capitals. So it is 2020. It is even year bullshit for the Capitals. They win the Stanley Cup every year. They won in 2018. They're about to win it again.

Alex Ovechkin and the Capitals are going to make another deep playoff run.

So this is all lining up for the Caps to make another deep playoff run... I would be very, very afraid if I were the Eastern Conference right now. Very afraid. Very afraid. I'm just calling it. It's our year.

I will eat one bite of horse shit if the Capitals beat the Penguins

I think you should have to eat shit if they beat the Penguins. Agreed. Just one bite. I'm not saying... Just one bite. Everyone knows the rules. ... Caps beat the Penguins. We're going to Central Park, and PFT's going to eat some shit. Just one bite.

The NHL is a money laundering operation for Russia

If you were to run the NHL as a money laundering operation, you would not do anything differently than Gary Bettman has done in the last 10 years... I'm guessing it's some sort of a money laundering scheme from Russia. That's the only thing I can come up with.