Takes

The Vikings are the worst 7-1 team of all time

I think [the Vikings] might be the worst seven and one team of all time... we know that the Vikings are a good team, we know they're fine, but like Kirk Cousins, it's gonna be very difficult for us to ever fully buy in.

Ayahuasca has given Aaron Rodgers too much perspective to be a successful quarterback

I think there are certain jobs that you should not want to have a lot of perspective if you're performing them... he says how like he's gained a lot of perspective how this year it's like, it's, it's great to see the people that I get to go to work with... If you're an NFL quarterback... you should probably be a perspectiveless psycho.

Justin Fields' style of play is not sustainable

Do you think that the usage of Justin Fields is gimmicky or sustainable?... the way he runs is not like Lamar Jackson. It's not as elusive... he takes more impacts. He's a larger body. He's gonna take more... eventually it will probably catch up with him.

Dan Snyder is officially going to sell the Washington Commanders

I've talked to enough people behind the scenes to know that Dan Snyder is in fact going to sell the Washington Commanders. Yesterday was no joke, the second best sports day of my entire life.

Aaron Rodgers is legitimately bad right now and it is not a fluke

I think that this is like, it's not a fluke that [Aaron Rogers] sucks right now. If he wants to, this is a perfect excuse for him. Just be like, 'Yeah, my thumb is extreme. The doctor said that he is never seen a worse thumb than mine.'

Justin Fields is officially the guy for the Chicago Bears

The argument that everyone made in the off season that the Bears were ruining Justin Fields by not getting him anyone. You can't then complain that they went and got [Chase Claypool]. I got my guy, I'm feeling confident about having my guy. I have, I have a guy. He is the guy... he's officially the guy. Build around Justin Fields. Everything else doesn't matter.

Anything done during the pandemic should be forgiven (Pandemic Amnesty)

My cool throne is pandemic amnesty. Turns out anything you do during the pandemic, we're all gonna forget about and forgive each other. I think anything should be forgiven. Like anything. No, but whatever it was, forgive me for it.

Tony Pollard is the best running back of the weekend over Derrick Henry

Tony Pollard's number one, because he took 15 rushes to get 131 yards. It's not just the number of yards. It's also how many times did I touch the ball to get it? Derrick Henry, I think had 32 carries for 219 yards... Parlor, we can't run him 30 times. That's not him. But yes, I believe that he's a true playmaker.

Chase Daniel has the greatest NFL career of all time

Would you argue, and I would make this argument, that you actually have the greatest NFL career of all time with 178 pass completions and 42 million made? ... Tom Brady's made 40,000 per completion. You've made 235,000 per completion.

Trevor Lawrence is officially back in the bust category

Trevor Lawrence is now back officially into the bust category. ... This is as rock bottom as you can be if you're a Jaguars fan because you have the guy that was supposed to be the next Peyton Manning, the surest like sure thing. Oh, and then you might miss.

The Vikings are frauds

I guess I have to say now I had this circled on Friday show as this is the game the Vikings will be proven to be frauds. I was wrong. The Vikings won this game... [but] I agree with [PFT], I still think they're frauds.

Tua Tagovailoa is having a better season than Justin Herbert

Tua Tagovailoa's having a better year than Justin Herbert right now. He is the guy... I think if Tua didn't get hurt, they would be at the top of the AFC right now.

Mike McCarthy must reach the NFC Championship game to keep his job

I think he needs to get the NFC Championship game. ... Because you're expected to win. ... If he loses in a comically fat fashion, for Mike McCarthy, if he looks where his brain just stops... I could see Jerry Jones firing him.

Tom Brady should retire right now

Today is Friday, October 28th and Tom Brady should retire. The Buccaneers are a pathetic, pathetic football team. Oh my God. Tom Brady should retire.

Bill Belichick cannot hold his staff accountable because of nepotism with his sons

[Belichick] has got two kids working for him. And if one of those kids needs to be fired, he can't do it. And that makes it impossible for him to hold other people accountable. I think that's the root of where things kind of got wobbly... if you can't hold your kids accountable, you can't hold anybody accountable.

Sam Ehlinger is mobile enough to light up the Commanders offense

I'm going Colts minus three over the commanders... Sam Ehlinger, I think he's a mobile quarterback enough to light up an offense. We see these mobile quarterbacks getting first downs, extending drives. I think the Colts gonna have the fire in their belly.

Matt Patricia is to blame for Mac Jones' struggles because the offense was designed for Bailey Zappy

I think the situation is much worse. I think it's Matt Patricia's fault... Mac Jones may have started in taking all the starting reps and practice, but the type of offense that the starting offense was running in that first drive was really a Bailey Zappy offense... that scheme was very different to anything they were running last year. And with that, that's because they were playing to Bailey Zappy's skill.

Justin Fields bought himself a fifth-year option with his performance against the Patriots

This is one of those moments where you wish you were us because I'm gonna be living off of like that performance from Justin Fields. He just bought in my mind his fifth year option. Like that's how overreacting I am.

Aaron Rodgers is blaming his teammates for the Packers' struggles

Guys who are making too many mistakes shouldn't be playing. Gotta start cutting some reps. So it's not his fault, it's his teammate's fault.

Sam Ehlinger will be a successful game manager for the Colts

The most hilarious would be if they just came in and they went old school and just ran Jonathan Taylor 35 times a game and asked him to be a game manager. They make the playoffs and then you can still claim he's a better quarterback than Trevor Lawrence. That's what I'm hoping for.

The Yankees are a bad franchise

Congratulations the Red Sox, the Phillies, the Cubs and the Nationals have all gone to the World Series and the Yankees have not... That's a bad franchise. No hiding from it. It's a bad franchise.

The Atlanta Falcons will make the playoffs

I think the Falcons are gonna make the playoffs. Ooh, that's my take. How I think they might make the playoffs... the most likely possibility for the Falcons to make the playoffs would be if the Buccaneers imploded entirely.

The Sixers and Lakers are tanking for Victor Wembanyama

Tanking in the nba... there is a clear, clear, clear number. One Victor Wembanyama from France... so teams are tanking. The Sixers oh three trying to get 'em. Lakers oh three trying to get 'em.

I will buy Colts season tickets if Jim Irsay forces Dan Snyder to sell the Commanders

I've decided, you know, we talked about like, I would become a Colts fan if Jim Irsay was the straw that broke the camel's back. Yep. I'm gonna buy season tickets to the Colts next year. Wow. If, if, if Jim Irsay can get down out the fuck out, I'm gonna be a Colts season ticket holder.

Yordan Alvarez is the best hitter I have ever had to scout

We've faced Yordan [Alvarez] this year. He was, he's the best hitter I've ever had to advance scout. Whoa. I'm talking about covering all the pitches, hitting lefties, everything. He's the best hitter I've ever had to had to scout.

Taylor Heinicke is going to beat the fuck out of Aaron Rogers

I'm pretty pumped up about Heineke going into Green Bay and just beating the fuck out of Aaron Rogers.

The Green Bay Packers are officially broken

I don't want to get excited but I think the Packers are officially broken. There's two games, the Giants and Jets, where they are a touchdown favorite in both and it just doesn't, like Aaron Rodgers doesn't lose these type of games at home.

The Atlanta Falcons will win the NFC South

I'm actually thinking about putting a future on the Falcons to win that division. I think the Falcons are definitely good.

Bailey Zappe should remain the Patriots starter even if Mac Jones is healthy

Bailey Zappe is very fun to watch... unless Bailey Zappe puts up an absolute stinker next week, I would be surprised if they take him out to starter.

The Dodgers' 2020 World Series title doesn't count

The Dodgers have not won anything. We can We agree The bubble, the bubble championship didn't, didn't count.

Monte Sweat is a better player than Chase Young

Our defensive line played well. Monte Sweat is a monster. I actually think Monte Sweat is better than Chase Young. Even when Chase Young was healthy.

Dan Snyder is willing to take down the entire NFL with him if forced to sell

Dan Snyder's entire strategy is, if you take me out, I'm taking everybody out with you. And he is going to, Dan Snyder is willing to take down the entire NFL with him.

The Baltimore Ravens will win by 20 and the regression starts this week for the Giants and Jets

I think everyone's riding high on the Giants and the Jets. Honestly, I think maybe it's biased just living in New York and hearing the excitement... I don't think it's gonna happen. I think the regression starts this week. The Ravens win by 20.

Travis Kelce could score four touchdowns every game if the Chiefs really wanted him to

I feel like Travis Kelce, if the Chiefs really, really wanted to, he could score four touchdowns every single game.

I'm betting the Tennessee money line against Alabama

I'm going money line on Tennessee. Yeah. I like, I think this Tennessee [team], well it depends on if what's his name, [Cedric] Tillman's back.

Russell Wilson was a system quarterback and Pete Carroll fleeced the Broncos

I think it's fair to say at this point that Russell Wilson might have been a system quarterback. Because Geno Smith right now, if we're grading who won that trade? Pete Carroll is doing the monopoly man's strut and he is like, Yeah, fucking fleece. The Broncos got fleeced, he got rid of Russell Wilson. Like he was bad penny.

I could be a successful NFL coach by 'coaching on vibes'

In my head, everyone's like, thing is so crazy. Why don't we just go for 10 points? Because then they can't beat us with a touchdown and a field goal. If we were rolling we should just keep rolling. [Big Cat: Billy would always coach on vibes].

The Dan Campbell 'tough loser' era is effectively over

I think that Dan Campbell thing is done. I think it's done. I feel like I've seen the same thing you were saying. They're the most fun team with football. They're fun, but that doesn't mean the coach is good. They make self-inflicted errors every week. I just feel like Dan Campbell leads the league in just doing dumb shit and then getting in front of the media and just being like, that's on me.

The roughing the passer call against Tom Brady was the worst call in NFL history

I think that roughing the passer call sucked. Do you think that was the worst call in NFL history? I think it might be the worst call in NFL history.

If James Madison finishes undefeated, I am declaring them National Champions

If we do go undefeated, I'm going to declare that to be a national championship. Have to. First year five games into playing an actual FBS schedule and James Madison is now ranked 25 in the nation. My hands are tied.

Russell Wilson officially stinks

We saw Russell Wilson. Just he, can we just say he stinks cuz he stinks. Russell Wilson sucks. Stinks. I think he sucks right now. He's, It's worse than stinks. He's throwing behind everybody. He's playing like he's scared to do anything out there. Anything. He's terrified.

Nathaniel Hackett is booty cheeks

Nathaniel Hackett is booty cheeks. And if we didn't say that, then we're frauds. I will trash us for not trashing Nathaniel Hackett... he is, he wanted to talk about booty cheeks.

Eating 14 hot dogs in 12 hours is not a lot of food

When you say 14 hot dogs in 12 hours isn't that much. It's not. That's a fat ass statement. Not that you're a fat ass, but... it's really just dealing with Stu Feiner all the time.

The Detroit Lions won the Jared Goff/Matthew Stafford trade from a purely passer perspective

It's time to ask like who really won that trade Cat? The Rams or the Lions. [Big Cat: I'd want Jared Goff.] That's smart. So it's time to ask like who really won that trade... I mean Super Bowls, that's a team stat. Just from a purely passer perspective.

Steve Sarkisian will be on the hot seat if Texas loses the Red River Showdown

Sark definitely could be on the hot seat if he loses this game [Red River Showdown]. [PFT: You think so?] I mean they've they've they played Alabama close then they lose to Texas Tech if they lose to if they lose to Oklahoma, people are gonna start asking questions.

Losing a preseason game to an NBL team is bad for Chris Paul's legacy

The sun's lost their first games. Good for us. They lost an NBL team, an Australian league team... How did Chris Paul do though legacy wise? [Hank:] I mean, that's bad for your legacy. [Big Cat:] I'm gonna count that as another 3-1 lead blown.

Teachers are not blue-collar workers

I don't think the teacher is [blue-collar]. I would say no to that... I don't I think they eat in the cafeteria. [Big Cat: It's mental blue-collar.] I don't know if a teacher is, and it's no disrespect to teachers out there... But I, I don't think they'd say it's blue-collar.

Patrick Mahomes would lead the Texans to the playoffs right now

The reality is, I think if you put Patrick Mahomes on the worst team in the league, I think they make the playoffs. Yeah, I think he's that good. I think he is. If he, if Pat, if you took Patrick Mahomes right now and put him on the Texans... they probably make the playoffs.

Trevor Lawrence is a bad weather quarterback

Can Trevor Lawrence not play in rain?... I'm just excited cuz we can start a narrative, a new narrative of bad weather guy where we can just bet against Trevor Lawrence.

Bailey Zappy is 'the guy' for the Patriots

I think he is. He is. They let him throw, if they let him throw the ball, he's the guy when they let him throw the ball... there was a spark and an energy when Bailey Zappy was playing today... I was more excited today watching that game than pretty much any of the other games.