Takes

I have reached a point in my career where I am completely confident that I am simply very good at my job.

There was a moment where I went, 'Hey, you know what? I'm fucking good.' I'm just good at this job. ... The collection of what I am now at this point, my abilities, I was like, 'I'm fucking good.' ... Once you're like, 'Hey, you know what, I'm pretty fucking good at this,' I think you become even better because now you've freed up all this other room to just continue to execute.

Medieval Times is the best place in the world

Medieval times. Medieval times is the best place in the world. It is so fun. You go there, they give you a Turkey leg the size of your torso, they give you flaggings of ale, they fucking bring you flaggings of ale. Then you get to watch Knight. ... Medieval times is the best place on earth.

The Louvre is overrated; if you visit Paris, go to the Musee d'Orsay instead.

The Louvre is overrated. ... If you go to Paris, go to Musee d'Orsay. Don't go to the Louvre. Fuck the Louvre forever.

The Galapagos Islands is the most unique place on Earth

My favorite vacation, my actual favorite vacation was the Galapagos Islands and Ecuador And. it is, it's the, it's the most unique place on earth that you can go to. ... I jumped in the water, it's perfectly clear and this fucking sea lion starts swimming up to me and he's like trying to get me to play.

Keeneland Racetrack is the Wrigley Field of horse racing

Keland Racetrack in Kentucky is, they only race April and October. It is fucking awesome. It's, it's the Wrigley Field, Fenway Park of race of horse racing. If. you ever want to go for a weekend with your boys? That's, I would put that at the top of the list.

The NFL cares less about its fans than any other major professional sport

There's no major sport that its owner group gives less of a fuck about fans than the nfl. Yeah. ... I get maximizing every dollar that you can make. But I think the NFL usually takes it to a level where you start going like, dude, is it, is it this important?

Actually considering going to the doctor when you feel physically wrong is a definitive sign of getting old.

Number one on my list was actually considering going to the doctor when you feel wrong. ... It actually crosses my mind for like, as I've gotten a little older, I'm like, 'Should I go to the doctor?' And that was something I never, ever thought about.

Being excited to open the mail is a sign that you are getting old.

My first pick was going to be opening mail, but I think I should change it to excited to open mail. Because I had a stack of stuff... and I was like, 'Look at me opening this shit.'

Starting conversations with 'Did you know that in World War II...' is a definitive sign of getting old.

I'm going to say anytime you start a question with, 'Did you know that in World War II...' I'm in the middle of this Vietnam book... it's fucking killer. ... I don't want society to just abandon the people that need the help the most, but I'm in the middle of this Vietnam book.

Hearing Creed or Dave Matthews Band on a Classic Rock station is an existential crisis

When I heard Creed on a classic rock channel, I lost my shit. ... I also heard Dave Matthews band on Classic Rock. Oh, that's, that sucks to think about. ... we are as far removed as Crash by Dave Matthews Band as when we were growing up. We were from like Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin.

Getting genuinely upset when a game doesn't tip off exactly at its scheduled time is a sign of getting old.

Getting actually upset when a game doesn't tip off when it says it's going to tip off. I used to joke about it, but now it's like, if it says eight-thirty and they tip off at 8:43, I'm like, 'What the fuck? Why did you fucking tell... that's another 13 minutes that I'm not going to be in bed. This is bullshit.'

Being able to nap on a couch instantly for 15 minutes is a definitive sign of getting old

The last one, this might be more of a dad thing, but I, I If you put me on a couch, I can nap like almost instantly for 10 minutes, 15 minutes. ... and now I've gotten to that point and it's like, fuck that is me.

Getting pissed off that NBA refs don't call carrying anymore is a sign that you have become your father.

Getting actually pissed off during a basketball game that they don't call carrying anymore. Calling players doing like pointing at the TV and saying, 'That's a carry.' That was a moment for me where it's like, I am my dad at this point.

Standing at the beach and just staring at the horizon is a definitive sign of getting old.

Staring at the horizon at the beach. You're at the beach and you're standing there and you're just looking off in the horizon. Dudes in their twenties are playing spike ball... and then you'll just see like an old dude who's got his hands on his hips and he's just looking off in the horizon.

Heat culture is dead

Today is Friday, June 9th and heat culture is dead.

The Heat are in deep water because they can't match the Nuggets' height

I think [the Heat] are in deep, deep water because they're just, nuggets are better and taller and tall. Tallness matters. Height matters. It does in in basketball.

Ja Morant is weaning himself off guns like a nicotine patch

Ja Morant who his camp is now alleging that it's a toy gun. So if it were a toy gun credit's a Ja because he basically like, it's like a nicotine patch. He's weaning himself off guns.

The Vikings are smartly rebuilding for the future

The Vikings seem to be doing things like rebuilding type things where they realize, hey, maybe last year was a little fluky, so they are trying to trade Dalvin Cook probably gonna cut him. And then they're also taking offers for Danielle Hunter... smart moves by them to be like, Hey, we probably can't replicate what happened last year. Maybe we should start figuring out a way to sell high.

Matt LaFleur is the best looking coach from the former Washington staff

He is the best looking guy. The best looking guy. He's the best looking. And I'll say this because I know Sean McVay would get upset, but he's, he's of the, of the fun bunch of that group. He's by far the best looking guy. Not even close.

Tua Tagovailoa is criticized because he is different and left-handed

The starting point is he he is, he is different. Different is kind of makes people uncomfortable. I'm not sure if you guys noticed he throws with his left hand. Yes. Not his right... I think anytime there's also a lot of conviction and when there's a lot of conviction with people and they're, they're over the top about it, people tend to speak up more in the negative.

I pledge my allegiance to the Miami Heat over the Nuggets in the Finals

I don't lose any sleep whatsoever to, to pledge my allegiance to the Miami Heat because... hearing their problems of that off season that they were trying to solve... I feel very personally invested into their whole, into their whole movement.

Designated downfield laterals could revolutionize NFL offense

What you're saying is not that outside the box... there's some traction the way teams pursue and compressed tackle in the league. You'll get people to overplay and could... now normal balls explosive and unguardable.

Toronto is a bad sports town because Canadians can't win a Stanley Cup

Toronto was a bad sports town. Although, you know... That's just Canadians out. They, they gotta, Canadians gotta pass... They can't win a fucking Stanley Cup. And it's their sport.

Jay Monahan is the biggest scumbag in the world

Jay Monahan, the biggest scumbag in the world, the biggest scumbag in the world. He brought in 9/11 families to act as a human shield for what he was doing behind the scenes, which was negotiating with the LIV tour to try to make the PGA tour more money in the long run. While again telling the golfers on the PGA tour, don't do business with these people. They are evil. So yes, he's the biggest piece of shit in the world.

LIV Golf comes out of the merger looking like the Michael Scott Paper Company

The LIV tour, by the way, they come out of this smelling like roses. They're the Michael Scott Paper Company comparably to the PGA tour. They started their own tour. Everybody laughed at 'em. Their ratings were bad. But at some point along the way, the PGA tour needed the LIV tour just as much as the LIV guys needed the PGA tour.

Team golf doesn't work long-term

I still don't, I think the LIV knew that like team format doesn't work, team formats don't work in golf. It just doesn't. The way golf works is you have a bunch of guys competing against each other for the best.

Athletes should always take the 'insane amount of money' when offered because sports leagues have zero loyalty to players

If somebody is offering you an insane amount of money to play a sport, you should probably take that money. Because guess what? When it comes down to it, the league that you have any sort of loyalty to will not have any loyalty to you whatsoever if they can make a 10th of a percent more in net profit 10 years from now. Anytime somebody can pay you 10 times your total income to play a sport for fewer days a year... absolutely, a hundred percent, take that money.

The pitch clock should be turned off in high-leverage baseball situations like bases loaded with two outs

It was Penn versus Southern Miss. It was 3-2, bases loaded, two outs. Best, probably one of the funnest situations. Baseball crowds going crazy and the ump called the clock violation and called 'em out. Which is just like... that should be another unwritten [rule] where if that's the count, that's the situation, the clock does not matter. Turn the clock off.

The alien whistleblower might be a government plant to trick China and Russia into thinking the US has recovered alien technology

This guy might just be making it all up and he's authorized by the government to make it up because that way China and Russia are like, wait, what the fuck? We don't have any alien craft. They know all this technology in the United States that we don't know yet. And then their military starts to panic and they get scared of us cuz we think we got that alien shit.

The Nuggets losing Game 2 of the NBA Finals was a 'good loss' that they needed to wake up

It sounds like what you're saying is... the Nuggets losing [Game 2] was a good loss. It woke them up. They needed something like this. [Windhorst]: That's exactly the way Michael Malone phrased it. You won't see it on television because it had to be bleeped, but... it's exactly what he said. I imagine the bus just pulled up to Jeff Green's house and they had a bonding dinner... and then today they had a film session where Malone showed 'em 17 clips where they screwed up. So they're saying they're gonna do better.

The PGA/LIV merger is a total victory for Saudi Arabia

The general reaction is that this is a win for the Saudis. What's a reaction from the players? You've got the LIV players. Taylor Gooch is on there tweeting a picture of his feet at a beach. Phil is dancing. This is a victory for them. They've wanted this all along.

Jay Monahan and Rory McIlroy are the biggest losers of the LIV/PGA merger

The biggest losers in this, Jay Monahan number one, probably Rory McIlroy number two. Not because Rory's a bad guy, just because he was the most vocal. And Brandel Chamblee, because he really dug his feet in on the take. It's one of the saddest days in the history of professional golf.

The Heat's defensive strategy of letting Nikola Jokic score while shutting down his passing works

[The Heat's] strategy was we're gonna let Jokic score as many points as he wants to... Just be a scorer... because two points is not as much as three points. And so their zone defense was kind of predicated on allowing him to be a scorer, not a passer.

Erik Spoelstra is the best coach in the NBA

The [Miami Heat] are a really fucking good team. And Spo is the best. Yeah. He is the best coach.

The Florida Panthers' physical style of play might not work against the Vegas Golden Knights

Florida is like a team that as a team feels like they just want to get in fights and bother you. And Vegas is the most disciplined big team that it might not work for them. It's obviously game one, but it might not work against a team like Vegas who's like, no, fuck this, we'll play hockey.

Getting a hole-in-one is the best thing a man can do

It's like the best thing that a man can do. Yeah. Is get a Hole in one.

I would never take a job that requires waking up at 3:30 AM

I am officially taking my name out of the hat... because of the early wake up time. I actually don't think that there's a single job in the world that I would do if it meant that I had to wake up at three thirty in the morning every day.

The Saudi Arabian soccer league cannot compete with the MLS model of paying aging superstars

Basically they're just completely cucking the MLS's model, which is just pay aging superstars for a fuckload of money to come finish out their career over here. We can't compete with that.

Mark Zuckerberg definitely got choked out during his Jiu-Jitsu competition despite his denials

The last thing you wanna do is have an update to the report being like, just so we're clear, we talked to multiple people. He was never choked out because now I'm like, dude, the guy got choked out. You don't have to update saying I wasn't choked out unless you were very clearly choked out.

Luke Fickle will be awesome at Wisconsin

And we hopefully will find somebody like Luke Fickle. Yes. Who I told you prior to the, you know, our taping here. I think he's awesome. Yeah. And I, all Wisconsin fans will not know what to do with themselves when like a fifth wide receiver steps on the field. Even once. I love him... He's funny, he's engaging, he's young. He's exactly who Wisconsin should be going for.

The NFL Draft is an unbreakable TV event because of the 'transaction of hope'

I totally geek out about it. I do not care what anybody else might say. I think it's, it's unbreakable. It's something As long as everybody wants to actually gather around a television set for three days and watch an event where the power brokers are not physically there.

Aaron Rodgers can play deep into his 40s like Tom Brady

I do believe Rodgers can be Brady 2.0 in terms of playing deep into his forties. If that is something he wants to do. He doesn't look to be a broken down guy. He looks to be the exact opposite. Taking care of himself.

The Washington Commanders should change their name to the Washington Football Team and then the Hogs

I would love to see them go back to Washington football team... Do a placeholder season... If I'm Josh Harris, I'm taking over a team. Change everything... Change it to the football team again. And then the year after that, change it to the hogs. Hogs would always made the most sense. It's a great name.

Justin Fields is the guy for the Chicago Bears

So you think Justin Fields is the guy? [Eisen] Yes, I do too. I think they made the right move.

Urban Meyer would fail if he returned to college coaching in the transfer portal era

You think Urban would be able to coach in the transfer portal era where somebody's basically like, I don't like the way you've treated me... His way or the highway. And as you know, and you'll get drafted. There's now a highway. There's now a highway.

Jamal Murray is currently the best 'Robin' (second option) in the NBA.

Jamal Murray continues his stretch of being like the best. Is he the best Robin going right now? He's definitely... if he was on a team with anybody except for Jokic, everybody would talk about him being the finals MVP. He is the best Robin.

Watching a big man who can pass is the best thing to watch in all of sports.

Watching a big man that can pass like Jokic is maybe my favorite thing in all of sports to watch. I'm thinking through every single league... but I actually think that watching a big man that is just throwing no look passes over his head from the post down low... that's my favorite thing in all sports.

The Celtics are a better team than the Nuggets and everyone else in the NBA.

The Celtics are probably the best team in the NBA if you really look at it position by position, player by player. You know, we ran into a Heat team that was getting frisky at the right time. But we're still a better team. We're a better team than [the] Nuggets. We're a better team than everyone.

Erik Spoelstra is the greatest NBA coach of all time if he wins titles without LeBron James.

I wouldn't hate it if [Spoelstra] ripped off five or six titles in the next 10 years because I absolutely would say that he's the greatest NBA coach of all time and that's why LeBron won those titles. So I am definitely a part of me that's a big Spo fan being like, go Spo go win a bunch of titles without LeBron and then I will say that you're the GOAT.

Erik Spoelstra's 2023 playoff run is the best coaching job in NBA history.

Let's just say it right now. The best coaching job we've ever seen of all times... this playoff run, win the title or not, best coaching job we've ever seen.