Takes

The Browns are smokescreening everyone by pretending to like Josh Allen with the #1 pick

Everyone thinks they're going to take Sam Darnold, but they're making a lot of moves for Josh Allen. And everyone says they like Josh Allen, but it's a smokescreen. And they have the first pick.

Kawhi Leonard will never play another game for the San Antonio Spurs

Kawhi's never playing another game for the San Antonio Spurs. I don't know... I really don't think so... The fact that he's not even speaking to anyone, it seems like he's not speaking to anyone on the Spurs... I don't think he's ever playing another game for the Spurs.

LeBron James will not go to the Sixers if they win the title this year

The Sixers don't want to win this year... if the Sixers win this year, then there's no chance LeBron goes to Philly. LeBron James is many things now, but he's not a ring chaser.

Derek Jeter will not last five years as Marlins owner

I'm being told by some other people I know in baseball... We don't think Jeter lasts the five years. We think that the owners and investors have a pressure on him.

The Bucks might sweep the Celtics in the first round

Bucks are maybe even going to sweep the Celtics.

I am going to go viral singing Cardi B songs

I think I can go viral being a Cardi B remixer... I'm literally just going to sing her lyrics into a camera and just be like, check it out, y'all. I love Cardi B... My goal is in the next week to go viral singing Cardi B.

Success for Northwestern means winning the Big Ten West

We can't control that [Rose Bowls], but we got to win the West.

Colin Kaepernick will not get an NFL job this year

No, I don't think he's [Kaepernick] going to get a job this year.

Scott Frost will build an 11-win team at Nebraska

We're going to walk into Nebraska and Scott Frost is going to build an 11-win team. And I'm going to be very, very upset about it.

The Pacers will be a much harder first-round challenge for Cleveland than people think

Right now, as we have this conversation, the Pacers are matched up against the Cavaliers. I think that series is actually going to be harder for Cleveland than other people might think. The Pacers are legit tough this year.

The Washington Capitals will sweep the Columbus Blue Jackets

John Tortorella is a world-class piece of shit, and I love watching him get beat. I'm predicting a sweep in the first round.

The Timberwolves will upset the Rockets or Warriors if they make the playoffs

I got a take that if the Timberwolves make the playoffs, they're going to upset someone. Either the Rockets or the Warriors.

Sam Bradford will lead the league in completion percentage next year

Tune in next year when Sam Bradford leads the league in completion percentage. After he's been traded for two first-round picks to the Jets.

Sergio Garcia will never win another Major

Sergio and the fact that he's known for choking and that he'll never win a major. Ever.

Eastern Conference NBA teams that wear red will lose early in the playoffs

Eastern Conference teams that wear red lose early in the playoffs. So I guess this year it would just be the Raptors, the Heat, and the Wizards are all going to lose very early on.

The 2018 NBA Finals will be the Sixers versus the Timberwolves

I actually got put on the spot today, and I said it's going to be the Sixers versus the Wolves.

The Blackhawks will make the playoffs next year but aren't Stanley Cup contenders anymore

I think that this is maybe just a one-off year, and next year it could be quickly fixed. I think they'll get back to the playoffs. Contenders, that could be in trouble now.

The Capitals will lose in the second round because they can't beat the Penguins

They have to play Pittsburgh and they can't beat them... Malkin won't lose to Ovechkin. So unless Pittsburgh gets upset in the first round, they're done. I mean, they will lose in the second round.

The Golden Knights will lose in the first round of the playoffs

I've stuck by my guns that they're going to lose in the first round. I'm just staying on it. I don't think they can match up with a team who has, like, a superstar.

Nashville and Tampa Bay will play in the Stanley Cup Final, and Nashville will win

I have money on Nashville. I've had it for a while. They're my pick at the beginning of the year. Them and Tampa to play each other. Nashville is a wagon.

Tiger Woods needs a 65 or 66 to win the Masters, which is unlikely

He's going to have to post like a 65, a 66 in there somewhere, which it seems from his game, it seems very unlikely that he can really go that low.

Jalen Brunson will not be a star in the NBA and will likely be a second-round pick

I still think Jalen Brunson is not going to be a star in the NBA. He probably is a second-round pick.

The Patriots will draft Donte DiVincenzo with the 31st pick

I think DiVincenzo's still going to be on the draft board when the Patriots pick at 31. Yes, so he might get snatched up.

Drew Brees will have to play for several more years because he lost $8 million to a fraud jeweler

My cool throne is the New Orleans Saints. ... They're on my cool throne because Drew Brees is going to have to play for another couple years. Because it turns out he lost $8 million to a fraud jeweler.

The Yodeling Walmart Boy will eventually be found to be problematic

The yodeling Walmart boy. At some point, he's going to be problematic, right? ... I've seen this story play out on the internet enough. Someone in his family has a Confederate flag Facebook profile, and everyone's going to turn on him and be like, man, this kid is problematic.

Rob Gronkowski is increasingly likely to be traded because he's tired of Bill Belichick

The report is that the Patriots, the chances of them trading Rob Gronkowski are increasing because Gronk is tired of the... mental fatigue and physical anguish of playing football under Bill Belichick. ... I think the Gronkowski thing is real. ... Rob Gronkowski, he wants to have fun.

Tom Brady would lose his shit if the Patriots traded Rob Gronkowski

If he loses Gronk, Brady can't be far behind. If they were to trade Gronk, I think Brady would lose his shit.

Michigan will lose to Villanova by at least 10 points in the National Championship

Michigan had like a five-minute run in the second half of their game against Loyola where they looked really, really, really good. If they can play that way for the entire game, maybe they'll lose by 10.

Michigan will cover the spread against Villanova because water finds its level

I bet on Michigan like I'm going to because water always finds its level.

The Washington Capitals winning the Metropolitan Division means it is their year to win the Cup

Other big news, Caps won the Metro. Yeah, it's our year.

Villanova will beat Michigan 84-72 to win the National Championship

Tomorrow night, I'm an incredible basketball fan. John Beilein. Jay Wright. 84-72. Villanova [wins].

The MLB is on pace for a Subway Series this fall

For a second, it occurred to me that we're on pace for a Subway Series this fall. Because the Yankees look really good.

I love Loyola Chicago and Kansas in the Final Four

I have talked myself into both underdogs. So if you are looking to fade me because I've been ice cold, I love Loyola Chicago and I love Kansas. I think both are getting a little bit written off. I think everyone in their head has Villanova versus Michigan as their final game. And when you think something's going to happen, it's probably going to be the opposite.

The Washington Capitals will win the Stanley Cup this year

I am officially, without any sarcasm whatsoever... I think it is the Caps year... This is the Caps year.

The Los Angeles Rams are going to suck and miss the playoffs despite their talent

I think the Rams are going to suck. They have too much talent... They're a surefire lock to win the NFC West, possibly go to the Super Bowl. They're going to miss the playoffs.

Odell Beckham Jr. will be traded to the Rams

Mark my words. I think he might actually go out to L.A. Yeah. Because, like you said, they're becoming a super team.

Jared Goff will be the NFL MVP next year

Jared Goff, MVP candidate, he was probably the MVP of the league last year. And he will definitely be the MVP of the league next year.

Duke will win the 2019 national championship with Zion Williamson

2019 Duke national champions. No even reason to play the season. You can just mark it down right now. Duke is winning the title next year.

Jon Gruden will wear a 'Make Football Great Again' hat within the next year

I think at some point in the next year, John Gruden will wear a hat, make football great again.

I wouldn't be shocked if Loyola Chicago won the whole NCAA tournament

I wouldn't be shocked if they actually won the whole thing because they are playing unbelievable offense. And I mean, like the Butler team, you know, I mean, the teams make these runs.

Villanova is hands down the best team in the tournament

I think they're hands down the best team in the tournament. And they have a ginger that dunks. Which is very deceiving, right? It's like, you have it all. What do you get a team that has it all? You got guys who can shoot. You got guys who can play down low. You got NBA draft picks.

The 2018 World Series will be the Cubs against the Astros

I 100% believe that there will be two teams in the world series this year... i think it goes through Houston again right they they're the defending champ okay so cubs houston i like cubs houston

Kyrie Irving will be back and fine for the first round of the playoffs

He'll be back in three weeks, first round of the playoffs, no problem... Once [the debris is] out, he's completely fine.

Duke was guaranteed to win the title this year

I spent the last month, two months, three months saying that Duke was definitely going to win the title this year... guaranteed, locked up, no matter what happens, Duke is winning the title.

Duke is guaranteed to win the 2018 NCAA Tournament

We already know Duke's going to win it all. Yes. That is guaranteed. Yes. It's their year. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Kentucky will overlook their opponents and fail to reach the Final Four

I think something's going to happen in Kentucky. Yes. It's too easy for them, isn't it? Yes. It's just too set up for Kentucky to win the Elite Eight and go to the Final Four. Are they overlooking their opponents?

The Washington Nationals will win the World Series based on the Sports Illustrated cover logic

Actually, what this means is that in what, seven years the Nationals beat World Series champions? Because they predicted the Astros, the rise of the Astros. True. So whenever the first time that they picked the Nats was like eight or nine years from then, that's when they're finally going to win.

The Dodgers will be special and could win the World Series in 2018

It's not going to be Houston again. It's hard to go back to back. I believe the Dodgers can be a special this year.

The Raptors are the most likely team to beat LeBron James and the Cavaliers in the 2018 East

Probably the Raptors. The Raptors are so good right now. I think I believe in them, too. They are very good right now. All the guys are playing well. Everybody on their team is playing well.

2018 is the year Mark Few and Gonzaga finally break through to the Final Four

If it's going to be any year, Xavier's out, the one is out, and the two is out in their bracket. So Gonzaga could finally make their first Final Four, and Mark Few could finally be talked about as one of the best coaches in basketball.