PMT DB
PMT DB
John Cena on Blockers, Wrestling Reality, and Big Ragu's Tweets
Big Cat and PFT are still holding down the fort in San Antonio, refusing to leave the city until they’ve consumed every last tortilla chip in the greater metropolitan area. The reason for the stay was, of course, the National Championship game where Villanova absolutely dismantled Michigan. Big Cat watched the game with the grim realization that the Big Ragu and the rest of Jay Wright’s squad are just on a different level.
Big CatVillanova is a basketball death squad
Villanova is a fucking death squad of a basketball team. There was a moment... when Michigan was up... and then Dante DiVincenzo showed up and basically... it's like that's it for Michigan. I'll tell you, you've never seen a team be up so fast so early and then know the instant the game was over even though it was still a tie game.
While the celebration was on for the Wildcats, Big Cat isn’t exactly buying the hype on all their prospects. Jalen Brunson might be the most decorated player in the country, but the draft stock conversation got a little icy.
Big CatJalen Brunson will not be a star in the NBA and will likely be a second-round pick
I still think Jalen Brunson is not going to be a star in the NBA. He probably is a second-round pick.
With the college season in the books, the conversation naturally shifted to the next big sports milestone: The Masters. Big Cat is already warning the golf hardos to keep their distance while he enjoys the pimento cheese and the pristine greens of Augusta.
Big CatThe Masters is the best golf tournament and fans should be allowed to enjoy it however they want
The Masters are the best, and you just lay off. I don't care if you're a casual golf fan. All you hard-o golf fans out there, shut the fuck up. I'm going to enjoy the Masters any way I want. I'll say something wrong. I'll tweet something about a slice when it was a fade. I don't care.
Hot Seat/Cool Throne
Hank kicked off the segment by putting the Oakland A's and the entire sport of baseball on the Hot Seat after a dismal 7,000-person turnout in Oakland. It led to a larger discussion about whether the sport is simply fading into the background of the American consciousness.
HankThe Oakland A's low attendance signifies that baseball is dwindling away
My hot seat is the Oakland A's and baseball in general. Oakland A's only managed to draw 7,000 people for their game against the Rangers last night. ... I mean, baseball, another sign. Baseball's dwindling away.
PFT’s Cool Throne went to the New Orleans Saints, mostly because Drew Brees is now financially obligated to play until he's 50 after a jeweler reportedly fleeced him on some high-end diamonds.
PFT CommenterDrew Brees will have to play for several more years because he lost $8 million to a fraud jeweler
My cool throne is the New Orleans Saints. ... They're on my cool throne because Drew Brees is going to have to play for another couple years. Because it turns out he lost $8 million to a fraud jeweler.
Big Cat also used his Hot Seat to look into the future of internet fame, specifically targeting the Yodeling Walmart Boy. He’s seen this movie before and knows exactly how the internet cycle ends for every viral child sensation.
Big CatThe Yodeling Walmart Boy will eventually be found to be problematic
The yodeling Walmart boy. At some point, he's going to be problematic, right? ... I've seen this story play out on the internet enough. Someone in his family has a Confederate flag Facebook profile, and everyone's going to turn on him and be like, man, this kid is problematic.
John Cena Joins the Show
The guys welcomed the GOAT himself, John Cena, to talk about his movie *Blockers* and some of the more existential questions of his career. Cena, who worked on one hour of sleep, was surprisingly game for the mental chess match. He provided a very enlightened take on the 'is it real?' question that has followed him for two decades.
John CenaProfessional wrestling is just as 'real' as professional sports because both are forms of entertainment that people become obsessed with
I think wrestling's real. So wrestling runs a lot of parallels with sport. People get lost and obsessed in sport. Sport is merely a game. ... And what we do is just an exhibition to try to drum up the same fanatical response.
Between discussing the time Cena didn't care about a dead body during an episode of *Punk'd* and whether or not he'd fuck Big Cat's belly button, the conversation actually turned to fitness. For the award-winning listeners looking to get jacked, Cena shared the secret to the sleeve-busting look.
John CenaIf you want bigger arms, you should focus on your triceps instead of your biceps
If you want bigger arms first, I would focus on triceps because they're a bigger, meatier muscle. And you probably will do, like, more pressing movement, so you'll get bigger everything kind of.
Segments
PR 101 featured the hero of the title game, Donte DiVincenzo. Within minutes of the final buzzer, the internet did what it does best and dug up tweets from when the Big Ragu was in middle school. Big Cat was quick to jump to his defense, noting that judging a grown man by his 13-year-old self's desire to have his butthole licked is probably a bit much.
Big CatDonte DiVincenzo's old tweets aren't problematic because he was only 13
Dante DiVincenzo... some of the tweets are deemed problematic. Now, I want to make it very clear. I don't think any of these are problematic. ... It's also a 13-year-old that, like, is stupid. And if you remember when you were 13, you were a dumb fuck, too.
The show wrapped with some NFL Trouble in Paradise regarding Rob Gronkowski. Reports are surfacing that the relationship between Gronk and the Patriot Way is hitting a breaking point, and PFT thinks the fallout could be catastrophic for the locker room.
PFT CommenterTom Brady would lose his shit if the Patriots traded Rob Gronkowski
If he loses Gronk, Brady can't be far behind. If they were to trade Gronk, I think Brady would lose his shit.
Finally, Guys on Chicks gave Big Cat a chance to get vulnerable about his preferred sleeping arrangements. Forget being the protector; sometimes you just need to be held.
Big CatBeing the Little Spoon is the superior position because every guy just wants to be cuddled sometimes
Because being Little Spoon is awesome. ... Every now and then, a guy just wants to be cuddled. A guy just wants to feel like the world is a safe place.
If you're looking for us, we'll be at the San Antonio airport trying to convince the TSA that tortilla chips are a medicinal necessity.
