Takes

Zach Wilson's cross-body pro day throw was absolutely insane

Zach Wilson had an insane throw where he rolled out left and then cross body through towards the right pylon, like 70 yards in the air.

Michael Strahan sold out by getting the gap in his teeth fixed

My hot seat's Michael Strahan... He got rid of the gap in his teeth... His approval rating will probably, I mean, people are used to seeing the gap, and it's like, you know, embrace your imperfections, dude.

Kevin Durant has actually become more likable by being more online

Kevin Durant is the most online person of all time. I think he has done the impossible. Usually when people are more online, they become worse people... Kevin Durant has become more likable by being online more.

Baylor is beatable because they are a streaky shooting team

I'm caught between that they [Baylor] didn't play their best and still won, so they're really good, and they're beatable because they went three for 19 from three, and they were a little bit streaky. Their best players didn't play their A games.

Gonzaga is the 2018 Villanova of this tournament

Gonzaga's starting to feel like the 2018 Nova team that beat everyone by double digits and just blitzed everyone. We were at that championship game. They were an absolute wagon. It's starting to feel like that. Because you thought like, oh, Creighton, they hit the three... They didn't hang with them at all.

Alabama's refusal to shoot mid-range jumpers hurt their free throw shooting

I would ask maybe the lack of mid-range jump shots in practice and making it one point and saying everyone has to only shoot fours or twos had something to do with them going 11 for 25 from the free throw line in a very important situation.

The Mike Woodson hire at Indiana probably won't work

They hired Mike Woodson... He's never coached college basketball in his life... That doesn't feel like it's going to work. What do you mean? A guy who has never coached college basketball.

Billy Football doesn't have the punctuality to be a Navy SEAL

Billy drunkenly tweeted... 'I would trade it all to be a Navy SEAL.' Now... rule number one of being a Navy SEAL is punctuality. And Billy fails at that all the time.

People are overreacting to the Nets signing LaMarcus Aldridge

LaMarcus Aldridge signing with the Nets had everyone upset. I still don't understand why. Everyone does the tweet where it's like, look how many All-Stars the Nets have... This is they're doing everyone who's upset about this is doing my Kevin White bit being like Kevin White's a top 10 pick. Eventually you get old and LaMarcus Aldridge, great career, but he's not LaMarcus Aldridge of five, ten years ago.

Baseball suffered the most from having no fans in attendance

I'm very excited about baseball season because baseball, I think, was the sport that suffered the most not having fans in attendance. It didn't feel real with nobody in the stands. There's something about going to a baseball game in the middle of the day in the summertime.

Francis Ngannou's life story deserves a 30 for 30

We do need a 30 for 30 on Francis Ngannou's life. It's crazy. He worked in a sand mine when he was 10 years old in Cameroon... traveled to Europe, took 14 months, failed a bunch of times, had to go to prison because he illegally crossed the border... and now he's a world champ.

The Chicago Bulls are finally building a winning culture by trading for Nikola Vucevic

The Bulls basically took the entire Garpax regime and threw it in the trash can today, which was awesome. Vucevic coming to Chicago... I'm sick of missing the playoffs and getting the seventh pick and getting a guy that we have to wait on and hope is good. If you want to eventually be a team that can win in the playoffs, you have to make the playoffs. You have to have a culture of hey, we're trying to compete.

Mick Cronin wasted the 'dad hug' momentum by seeing his father in the first round instead of the Sweet 16

The whole storyline of not seeing his dad, not hugging his dad for two years... he used it in the first weekend. He should have brought his dad out for this weekend. Then they win this game. I truly believe that. They're showing Hep Cronin in the stands and being like, man, after this game, they're going to get the hug. They somehow find a way. A dad game is a game changer.

Soft basketball teams cannot win in the NCAA Tournament in March

You've got to get to the free throw line. Soft teams can't win in March. There you go. That was a Buffalo quote. I had a few quotes at Buffalo... quit avoiding contact. Get your butt to the free throw line.

Bill Walton incepted the Pac-12 teams into becoming the 'Conference of Champions'

He's [Bill Walton] incepted us into thinking that the Pac-12 is actually the Conference of Champions, and now he's incepted the teams themselves into believing in themselves so much that they are now advancing to potentially become the Conference of Champions.

The Pac-12 is officially back now that Larry Scott is gone

No, Larry Scott was the reason why, and he's gone, so the Pac-12 is officially back. Pac-12 is back big time.

If I become president, I will immediately ban any food that causes health conditions

If I become president, it's going to be an immediate change. I'm talking about a strong change. I'm going to start with food. I'm going to make sure any kind of food that I know draw any kind of health conditions, I'm just literally going to abominate it. I'm not going to ask for laws. I'm not going to ask for nothing. I'm literally going to just abominate them.

I'm a Must-Bust believer

I'm a Must-Bust believer. The runs that they [Arkansas] go on, when they decide to step on the gas pedal, the Must-Bust, and they turn it on against Texas Tech, it was like, there's no going back.

Coaches who have won a national championship should be required to wear a suit on the sidelines

If you've won a national championship, you should be required to wear a suit on the sidelines. Bill Self, no. Everyone else, yes. I like Bill Self in a suit. He's a good polo guy, but I agree. Coach K's a suit guy. Jay Wright's a suit guy.

The Syracuse zone defense is the most perfect invention in the history of college basketball

It's honestly like the most perfect invention in the history of college basketball. I can't think of a gimmicky type offense or defense besides maybe the triple option at certain schools that has existed for this long and will always fuck you up even when you know that it's coming for you.

Fill out a bracket when it comes out, then bet against it once the games start

As soon as the bracket comes out, you have to fill out a bracket and stash it away until right before the games are out... You just fill out a bracket without everybody saying right at that point. And then you put it away till Thursday and then you bet against it. It really works out a lot of the time.

Ryan Fitzpatrick is the most fun quarterback Washington could have hoped for

I am under no illusion that Ryan Fitzpatrick is going to come in and immediately turn the football team into a Super Bowl contenders because we already are Super Bowl contenders, but he is the most fun quarterback that I could have hoped for, besides [Jameis] Winston. He makes every week fun. No matter what happens, he's going to have some games where he throws for five touchdowns, he's gonna have some games where he throws for five interceptions.

The Bears are destined to never have a franchise quarterback

The Bears are just destined to never have a quarterback. Every time the Bears have the chance to possibly do a franchise-altering move, they find a way not to do it. It doesn't matter if the Bears have a top draft pick because we had a top draft pick and we drafted Mitch Trubisky. This sucks the soul out of my tone of be.

Houston is the number one fraud team among the tournament's top five seeds

Houston is my number one fraud. They're 24 and three. One of their losses was to Wichita State, they lost to East Carolina. These are very bad losses. Houston to me is what people think Gonzaga is. That's what Houston is now.

Villanova is a fraud team in the tournament without Collin Gillespie

Villanova's gotta be up there [as a fraud] just because they don't have Collin Gillespie anymore. I don't trust Villanova without a point guard.

Coaches need to stop calling isolation plays and start calling real sets at the ends of games

I'm just stating facts in the interest of fairness, Big Cat. Coaches need to call actual plays at the ends of games. They need to stop with the ISO, and then the guy has the ball, dribbles it three times between his legs, and then shoots from 25 feet because Steph Curry ruined basketball.

Pie is better than cake

One of my hottest takes, well, just facts in the interest of fairness, Pi is better than cake... Apple pie, blueberry pie, peach pie. Those are all better. Cheesecake is even a pie... if you take out ice cream cake, I think that that's easily, that's almost a blowout.

Oregon is the most under-seeded team in the 2021 NCAA tournament

The most under-seeded team in the 2021 NCAA tournament is Oregon... Dana Altman, the master of the Rubik's Cube... This team is more talented than its seed. I think they're a very difficult matchup for Iowa. I have a big Pac-12 breakthrough... I've got Oregon going to the second weekend.

The connection between Drew Brees and New Orleans is a unique player-city relationship that will never be replicated

I don't think we will ever see a player have a relationship with a city as unique and as deep as Drew Brees has with New Orleans. It's very rare for there to be that perfect set of events... what he did for that city and the pride that I think that city takes in Drew Brees... it goes beyond sports.

Coach K is a mastermind for using a COVID withdrawal to protect Duke's winning streak

I think you at least have to respect Coach K for being one step ahead of our brains that try to simulate what Coach K will do... they have bowed out gracefully after winning their opening round game, the ACC tournament... maybe the streak is still intact because who knows? Maybe Duke would have gone on to win the ACC tournament. It's actually a brilliant move on Coach K's part.

Coach K is the Frank Underwood of college basketball

Coach K, he'll do anything. He's Frank Underwood of the college basketball world. He will do anything to make sure that the message is not, 'Hey, Duke wasn't going to make the tournament.' Let's all forget that they weren't going to make the tournament.

Uniform colors and alternate jerseys significantly impact game outcomes and betting

I need there to be an account that basically says, 'Here's what everyone's wearing today. Make your bets accordingly.' And I know that sounds stupid, but my retort would be, 'No, you're stupid if you think that uniform colors don't matter.'

College basketball teams should be forced to wear practice pennies or go 'skins' if they have a bad record

I think teams should start wearing uniforms based on their records. So if you're a really, really bad team, you should actually be wearing your practice pennies. You shouldn't even get to wear real uniforms... Northwestern should just wear — they should have to be in skins against Minnesota last night.

The disc golf ranking system should be abolished because it is too subjective

I would say the easiest answer is to get rid of ratings... in disc golf, everyone has a handicap, essentially. And that handicap is highly the most important thing... and it's also very subjective how you get your handicap... There needs to be an actual ranking system based off of how you finish in a tournament versus what your score was.

Every major corporation needs a consultant specifically to identify if an idea will be mocked by the internet

It made me realize that I have job security no matter what in life in that every team and corporation should have on staff a person who essentially is just there to say, 'Hey, will we get made fun of for this?'... our, 'Will the internet make fun of you for this?' is absolutely a job we could do.

The defensive shift has ruined baseball

I'll do it. I'll say it. The shift has ruined baseball. Let's be fucking Peter Gammons on it for a second... The shift has ruined baseball.

Dak Prescott's new contract is the best deal ever signed for a player

It's actually, like, maybe the best contract that's ever been signed [for a player]... $126 million out of the $160 million is guaranteed. And it's four years.

Dak Prescott is an MVP-caliber player because the Cowboys stunk without him

You could make the argument that Dak is an MVP guy because you saw what happened when he went out last year. And the team just stunk. Andy Dalton is probably an average backup. So Dak goes out, Andy comes in, the team just goes to absolute shit.

Dak Prescott is the best quarterback in the NFC East

As a Washington football team fan, I'm not super excited because he's definitely the best quarterback in the division. There I said it. I know that's controversial.

I would rather have Dak Prescott's 4-year deal than Patrick Mahomes' 10-year deal

I'd rather have Dak Prescott's deal than Patrick Mahomes... [Dak] if he's good for these next four years, can get paid a ton of money again when the salary cap goes back up... He basically is giving himself another shot at it.

Conference Championship Week is often better than the actual NCAA Tournament

I think Conference Championship Week oftentimes is better than the actual tournament. I like the tournament more because it's just everything about it, but there are more games on Thursday and Friday at Conference Tournament Week than there are in the tournament.

Cocaine Bear is already a 'must-see' movie

Elizabeth Banks is to direct a bear-centric thriller, Cocaine Bear, for Universal... Just a movie, a must-see. I'm already slapping a must-see on it.

The NFL return of Kyle Long is a bad look for the Chicago Bears

Kyle Long will be returning to the NFL. Not to the Bears. But that's why they're on the hot seat, because he doesn't want to go back to them. I don't think it's a good or bad look. I think it's just the Bears.

The Buffalo Sabres are a 'broken organization' that needs to get worse to get better

It's just one of those organizations right now that seem a little bit cursed, and I would imagine that it's going to have to get a lot worse before it even gets better... They're a broken organization.

The NHL should adopt the 2-game baseball-style series format permanently

I 100% think they should adapt it, especially within teams of your own division... Why couldn't we just have banged out a back-to-back in Edmonton, saved ourselves the cost of fuel... I think they are going to adapt it moving forward.

Duke should look at firing Coach K right now

Over 30,000 people want Coach K fired. So I put up a poll when they were getting the shit kicked out of him by UNC. I said, should Coach K retire after this game or after the ACC tournament? ... I would look very hard at firing Coach K if I was Duke right now.

Replay review has ruined the watchability of basketball

Review in NBA and college basketball has ruined the watchability of basketball games because it just the last five minutes take forever. And they look at every little piece of the game and did it go off this guy? It was unwatchable. They need to dial it back.

There should be a shot clock on replay reviews

I want there to be a shot clock on reviews because not only would it speed it up and make it, like, if you can't figure it out within 30 seconds, stop, right?

Baseball is the only All-Star game that actually works

I really don't understand like the all star games. They just don't. Baseball is really the only all star game that really actually works because you can't not throw hard. It's one on one. It's just like no one's even playing.

The NBA All-Star winning team should get extra salary cap space

What if it was East versus West again and the winning team got more salary cap room for the next year? Then people would play hard? They get one extra mid-level exception. One extra guy.