PMT DB
PMT DB
Mark Titus on March Madness What-Ifs and Mt. Flushmore
We are grinding through April, and while the sports world is mostly dark, the energy remains high. Big Cat opened the show with a heavy heart regarding the state of the UFC. When Dana White finally has to listen to the government and cancel fights, you know the world is in a weird spot.
Big CatDana White being forced to cancel UFC events makes me very nervous about the return of sports
The UFC canceling their next pay-per-view is making me scared... when Dana White has to adhere to the rules makes me a little nervous.
Fyre Fest and the Gronk Rumors
Hank is spiraling because rumors are swirling that Rob Gronkowski might follow Tom Brady to Tampa Bay. It is the ultimate nightmare for a Patriots fan, but Big Cat sees the silver lining for Bill Belichick. In typical Belichick fashion, he’s probably already figured out how to turn a retired tight end into a mid-round draft pick without breaking a sweat.
Big CatBill Belichick won't care about Gronk leaving; he will just view it as getting a draft pick for nothing
There's not a single person better equipped to have like two of his star players leave him willingly than Bill Belichick... He'll probably get a great draft pick for and just keep moving on like not even think about... he would absolutely get something for nothing because Rob's not coming back to play.
PFT brought a more existential Fyre Fest to the table, mourning the potential death of the post-game handshake. Dr. Fauci mentioned they might be gone for good, and while PFT is happy to avoid the germs, he’s already thinking about what weird gestures will take its place.
PFT CommenterThe traditional post-game handshake in sports will likely never return
My fire fest of the week is I don't think that they're going to be any more hockey handshakes at the end of Big Time Stanley Cup Playoff Series because Dr. Fauci said that he doesn't think the handshakes ever go to I'm back. I'm happy about this... It absolutely is weird. If it was any other part of your body that you did this with it would be bizarre.
Mark Titus and the Tournament That Wasn't
Old friend Mark Titus joined the show to discuss the tragedy of launching a college basketball podcast in the one year there is no March Madness. The group played out some hypothetical scenarios for how the 2020 bracket would have ended. Titus is convinced that Dayton was destined for glory, potentially taking down the Jayhawks in an epic rematch.
Mark TitusDayton would have beaten Kansas to win the National Championship this year
I think they can beat Kansas... having a rematch with the national player of the year, the national Coach of the Year, a mid-major. When's the last time a mid-major won a national championship? It's been a long time.
Big Cat had his own fan fiction ready for the Big Ten, specifically a storybook ending for Tom Izzo and Cassius Winston. Even if it meant playing a literal nobody in the final, the visual of Izzo cutting down the nets again was the only way it could have ended in his mind.
Big CatMichigan State's hypothetical run would have ended with Tom Izzo and Cassius Winston winning it all against a nobody
I feel like they would have it feel like a fanfic for Michigan State would have had them playing complete nobody came and coming out of nowhere in the finals. So it would have even been a memorable final except for Izzo and Cassius Winston.
Mt. Flushmore of Things We’re Elite At Being Bad At
Instead of things they are actually good at, the guys and Titus drafted the things they absolutely fail at. Hank kicked things off with furniture assembly, Big Cat admitted he can't end a text conversation without making it awkward, and PFT confessed to having the balance of a newborn giraffe.
PFT CommenterI will break my wrist if I attempt to ride a skateboard during the tandem bike tour
I'm bad at balancing in general. So I've always wanted to surf or skateboard can't do it. If I get on a skateboard, I guarantee you within probably less than a second, I will break my wrist very bad.
Titus rounded out the draft by admitting he is the king of the "post-interview dead air," where a guest becomes dead to him the second the record button is turned off. It was a refreshing look at just how incompetent everyone is when they aren't behind a microphone.
Kings Stay Kings: Bill O'Brien and the Virtual Draft
Bill O'Brien continues his reign of terror as the Texans GM, trading for Brandin Cooks because why not? With the NFL Draft moving to a virtual format, Big Cat is placing high odds on the league's older, less tech-savvy coaches absolutely nuking their own war rooms.
Big CatBill O'Brien and Mike Zimmer will definitely be the ones to mess up the virtual draft technology
Bill O'Brien the head coach and Bill O'Brien the GM would be at the top of my list for that... I don't see them either one of them as being technology guys... Mike Zimmer definitely is going to be up there.
It isn't just the coaches, either. The image of Jerry Jones trying to navigate an iPad while fighting off his own family members is the content we deserve during this quarantine.
Big CatJerry Jones will definitely screw up the virtual draft technology by fighting over control with Stephen Jones
Jerry Jones simply trying to like rip the iPad out of Stephen Jones' hands and having fall and and logout is definitely on the table here... Jerry Jones still opens up his web browser it's probably Netscape and it goes to backpage.com.
Movie Review: The Garbage Picking Field Goal Kicking Philadelphia Phenomenon
To close out the week, the guys watched the 1998 Tony Danza classic about a garbage man who joins the Eagles. It’s a movie that skips character development in favor of shoving plot points down your throat, but Big Cat noticed it was shockingly prophetic about how NFL owners hold cities hostage for new stadiums.
Big CatThe Garbage Picking Field Goal Kicking Philadelphia Phenomenon was ahead of its time regarding stadium politics
I love the owner being like I'm an Eagles fan my whole life. I love this city and they're like, so you're not going to move. He's like, yeah. It's like so you're going to stay at the at this current Stadium. He's like, whoa didn't say that. We need a new Stadiums like hey, look there's every problem that every ownership video team has had ever had for the rent for the next 25 years... Stan Kroenke probably watch this was like, oh this is how it's done.
Between the CGI footballs and Tony Danza sleeping closest to the door to protect his 360-pound roommate, it might be the most "PMT" movie ever made.
Just remember to stay hydrated out there, or Tom Brady will personally find you and shame you.
