PMT DB
PMT DB
NFL Week 16 Recap: Lions Clinch, Ravens Crush Niners, and calling Mike Florist
Week 16 was a fever dream of holiday football. Big Cat and PFT spent the last three days eating, putting toys together, and watching nearly every snap of a 15-game slate. The Detroit Lions finally ended thirty years of misery by clinching the NFC North, the Ravens made a statement in Santa Clara, and the Chiefs might actually be in a free fall. It was a tight show via Zoom, but the guys covered every angle of the Christmas weekend action.
The George Pickens Experience and the Tomlin Way
The Steelers dismantled the Bengals on Saturday in a game that felt like it belonged in a different decade. Mason Rudolph looked like a legitimate NFL starter, but the story was George Pickens. After a week of being crushed in the media for his lack of effort, Pickens went out and put up a Randy Moss-style stat line. Big Cat noted that while it doesn't excuse everything, it proves why the Steelers keep him around.
Big CatGeorge Pickens is worth the headache
This was the George Pickens game. He had the Randy Moss stat line... it doesn't excuse everything George Pickens done this year, it just confirms that George Pickens is worth the headache because he has this in him.
More importantly, this win keeps the Mike Tomlin streak alive. We all knew it was coming. No matter how bleak it looks in Pittsburgh, Tomlin finds a way to keep that winning season streak intact.
Big CatMike Tomlin will find his way to nine wins
Whatever you wanna say about [Tomlin], he will find his way to nine wins. He's gonna find his way to nine wins. They had to win this game to find his way to nine wins... the Mike Tomlin path is set.
The Bills Survive and the Browns Ascend
The Bills almost did it again. They tried their best to lose to Easton Stick and a Chargers team wearing a hot dog suit, but Gabe Davis showed up for his once-every-five-weeks masterpiece. The AFC is so wide open that Big Cat is still holding onto the Bills as a serious contender simply because everyone else has come back to the pack.
Big CatThe Bills are worth betting at 35-1 to win the Super Bowl
If you like the Bills to beat the Chiefs, take 'em 35 to one to win the Super Bowl because the AFC is wide open. And it's not saying that the Bills aren't, it's not saying the Bills are some world beating team. It's that the rest of the pack has come back to the Bills.
Meanwhile, in Houston, Joe Flacco is officially the coolest story in the league. He is throwing absolute heaters to Amari Cooper and making the Browns look like the most dangerous team in the conference. PFT has seen enough to know that Flacco isn't just a backup; he's the best option the Browns have had in years.
PFT CommenterJoe Flacco is a better option for the Browns than Deshaun Watson
If he's healthy as he is right now, [Flacco] is without a doubt, a better option for your team than Deshaun Watson.
Big Cat is even starting to envision a path where the Browns actually make it to the Super Bowl, especially with that defense flying around.
Big CatI'm starting to think that the Browns might go to the Super Bowl
Joe Flacco and Amari Cooper... that was incredible. I'm starting to think that the Browns might go to the Super Bowl. Browns-Lions. If he's throwing the ball like that, you can win a Super Bowl if your defense continues to be like the best in the league by far.
Detroit Clinches and the Narrative Bowl
Lions fans finally have their moment. They clinced the NFC North for the first time in franchise history, and PFT was quick to point out that Jared Goff is playing at a level that rivals the guy he was traded for.
PFT CommenterJared Goff's stats are better than Matthew Stafford's this year
Jared Goff has 3,984 yards, 27 touchdowns, 10 interceptions. Matthew Stafford has 3,648 yards, 23 touchdowns, nine interceptions... Jared Goff more yards, more touchdowns, and only one more interception than Matthew Stafford this year.
In the late Sunday window, the Dolphins and Cowboys played the "Fraud Bowl." It was a game that mostly proved both teams are actually quite good, even if the ending was a slog. Big Cat noticed a massive Zeke-sized hole in the Cowboys' offense when they got near the goal line.
Big CatThe Cowboys win that game if they have Ezekiel Elliott
The Cowboys, it's funny how the narratives work... if they have Zeke Elliott, I think they win that game. They have struggled in the red zone all year, and Tony Pollard around the goal line has been a disaster.
Ravens Demolish the Niners and Calling Mike Florist
The Christmas night cap was supposed to be a heavyweight fight, but the Ravens turned it into a mugging. Brock Purdy threw four interceptions as the Ravens' defense made a massive statement. Big Cat and PFT have officially moved the Ravens into an elite tier of their own on that side of the ball.
Big CatThe Ravens and the Browns are the only two teams in the NFL that play defense on a different level
I did have the Ravens today and it's really just, I think the Ravens and the Browns are the two teams that play defense on a different level. When you have to play a defense that good, things don't come as easy.
Lamar Jackson also provided the quote of the year by calling Mike Florio "Mike Florist" after Florio predicted the Niners would kick the shit out of Baltimore. The guys called Mike to get his reaction to the new nickname, resulting in multiple hang-ups and some classic holiday chaos.
Who's Back and New Year's Resolutions
To wrap up, the guys looked ahead to 2024. PFT is preparing for "Pretty Much Dry January," which has enough loopholes to make any drinker proud.
PFT CommenterMy 'Pretty Much Dry January' rules allow drinking on Fridays, Saturdays, Monday Night Football, Sunday brunches, and any night I want a beer
I am going to be doing pretty much dry January again this year. The rules are as follows: no drinking unless it's Friday. If there's football on a Monday, you can also drink on a Saturday and you can have brunch on a Sunday and then you can have a beer during the week any night. But besides that, no heavy drinking whatsoever.
Big Cat, on the other hand, is leaning into his vices. While some people want to change for the better, Big Cat is looking for more of what he loves: Dairy Queen blizzards.
Big CatI will eat 50 Dairy Queen blizzards as my New Year's resolution
My New Year's resolution is I'm gonna eat more blizzards, Dairy Queen blizzards... New Year's resolutions are, to me, less about changing yourself for the better and more about just doing the things you like more... I'm thinking like 50.
Hopefully, the Ravens' defense doesn't hit Mike Florio as hard as Big Cat's phone "dying" during that interview.
