NFL Week 3, Fastest 2 Minutes, Dolphins Drop 70, The Bears Are The Worst Team In The NFL & A Special Monday Reading

The New York Jets should trade for Kirk Cousins

If you're the Jets, you gotta at least make a call about Kirk Cousins right now. I know they probably won't do it, but you have to ask the question... the Vikings have to admit, like, right now you're rebuilding.

Mike McDaniel should have kicked a field goal to break the NFL scoring record

Mike McDaniel should've kicked the field goal at the end of the game. This is chicken shit by McDaniel. I get you want like karma on your side... He should've kicked a field goal to score 73 points. Bullshit that he... it's more disrespectful to the Broncos that they just took a knee.

The Dolphins offense is only stoppable by injuries or cold weather

What can stop [the Dolphins]? The only two things that come to my mind are injuries, which you never wanna see happen, and cold weather. You just have to, if you're a team in the AFC, you gotta be like, hopefully it gets so cold that they can't do this.

Justin Tucker is washed up

I think Justin Tucker's washed up. He missed a 61 yard field goal. Everybody thought it was in... but yeah, it was like a yard short. He's washed up.

Derrick Henry has officially hit 'the cliff'

Derek Henry, I think today was his 1800th carry... it bums me out to even say this, but part of me thinks that it might be happening... he doesn't have the same pop. I hate that I have to even bring it up, but I feel like the cliff might be here.

Andy Dalton is currently better than Bryce Young

Andy Dalton can still play... and I think the Panthers were live in this game and I think it was because of Andy Dalton. Like, again, I'm taking the long-term approach for Bryce Young, but Andy Dalton is better than Bryce Young right now. Like that, that's just a fact.

Swifties secretly want Taylor Swift's relationships to fail for the music

I think secretly Taylor Swift's own fan base is sabotaging her happiness... Swifties want Taylor to be happy on their own terms. They don't want Taylor Swift to find genuine happiness. They want her to be happy because she's found empowerment after a disastrous breakup.

Mark Davis hired Josh McDaniels to get Tom Brady's help with inheritance taxes

Mark Davis, we all know that he's probably not gonna be able to afford the inheritance tax on the Raiders... Do you think that he hired Josh McDaniels as the head coach to get Tom Brady involved in the ownership group so that Tom Brady could then contribute to the tax bill when the time comes?

The 2023 Chicago Bears will go 0-17

My overly direct take is that the Bears are gonna go oh and 17.

The Chicago Bears will have the first and second picks in the 2024 NFL Draft

I think the Bears might have the first and second pick in the draft. That's my overly direct take.

Russell Wilson will be benched this year

I also have a direct take, overly direct take. I think Russell Wilson will get benched this year. I do, I do. Sean Payton has no allegiance to him.

The Dolphins are guaranteed an AFC Championship spot if Tua stays healthy

My overly direct take is that if Tua Tagovailoa stays healthy, his Dolphins are guaranteed a spot in the AFC Championship. Guaranteed. If he stays healthy, fully healthy. If he doesn't miss any games.