PMT DB
PMT DB
The Brewers are going to the World Series, Bo Nix is making Broncos fans question the entire concept of quarterback play, and college football has found yet another way to turn its regular season into bracket content. Then Mike Florio shows up with a flamethrower, a 25-year anniversary, and several predictions that could age beautifully or become premium PMTDB material.
The Brewers Are Woodpeckers
Milwaukee swept the Dodgers to reach the World Series for the first time since 1982, despite trailing in every game because apparently the Brewers prefer to make baseball dramatic before remembering they are the best team in it. Big Cat gave Jake Bauers the unofficial NLCS MVP for two brutal at-bats, while PFT made the case that Milwaukee is the kind of team everyone claims they want: disciplined, analytical, opposite-field hitting, and powered by an army of nerds instead of one giant free-agent bat.
Big CatThe Brewers are the best team in baseball
They're the best team at baseball all year, and they proved it. They absolutely decimated the Dodgers.
The Dodgers, meanwhile, were accused of having no juice, no fun, and no Kevin Millar-type idiot capable of convincing a team that the impossible is actually pretty easy. The Brewers now get a week to sit around and argue with baseball history about rest versus rust.
Bo Nix and the Quarterback Industrial Complex
Thursday Night Football was a defensive masterpiece if your definition of a masterpiece is six punts, 13 total first downs in overtime, and a quarterback completing passes that traveled approximately the length of a folding table. Sam Darnold was bad enough to throw the game away, but Bo Nix somehow made him look like the victim of the evening.
Big Cat said the Bo Nix problem is growing, while PFT went even further: reverse the quarterbacks and Denver still wins, possibly with Drew Lock. The Broncos got carried by their defensive line, and their offense gained just 32 yards over its final 10 drives. That is not a quarterback having a quiet night. That is a quarterback being escorted through a football game by the defense.
Big CatBo Nix's problem is getting bigger
The Bo Nix problem seems to be getting bigger and bigger. What are we watching?
PFT CommenterThe Broncos would have won with the quarterbacks reversed
If quarterbacks were reversed tonight, who wins? Broncos. I think Drew Lock on the Broncos would've won tonight.
College Football Gets Savannah-ified
The 24-team College Football Playoff announcement sent Big Cat into his familiar but completely justified “college football is ruined again” mode. His argument is that 12 teams already stretched the magic, and 24 teams makes September games feel even more disposable. PFT translated the whole thing into one of the best phrases of the show: the ongoing Savannah-ification of sports in America.
Big CatA 24-team playoff is ruining college football
We're moving to a 24-team playoff. It just sucks. We don't need 24 teams. Twelve is probably a stretch already. What made college football special was the regular season mattered so much.
PFT CommenterThe 24-team playoff is the ongoing Savannah-ification of sports
It's the ongoing Savannah-ification of sports in America. It's a sad day.
There was one possible silver lining: if teams can lose three or four games and still make the playoff, the Big Ten should force everyone to schedule two Power Four opponents in September. Naturally, everyone agreed that this would be better television, which is exactly why it will probably never happen.
The Colts, the Grocery Stick
The Week 6 preview featured the full NFL buffet: Caleb Williams possibly returning, the Eagles trying to survive without Jalen Hurts, the Browns embracing Cleveland weirdness, and Hank putting every single hole on the line against the Jets. The most memorable team diagnosis belonged to Big Cat, who declared Indianapolis the NFL’s grocery stick. Beat the Colts and you are good. Lose to the Colts and you are bad. The Colts are the measuring implement nobody asked for but everyone keeps using.
Big CatThe Colts are the NFL's grocery stick
The Colts have lost the last 18 of 21 games against teams over .500. They are the grocery stick team of the NFL. If you play the Colts and you lose to the Colts, you are a bad team. If you play the Colts and you beat the Colts, you are a good team.
PFT liked the Browns enough to flirt with an outright upset over Baltimore, while Big Cat eventually found a way to bet the Browns and the Ravens game in multiple directions. The Chargers also became a recurring emotional support animal, with Hank refusing to give up and Big Cat finally announcing that he was done betting them. This lasted roughly until the next Chargers conversation.
Mike Florio Brings Receipts
Mike Florio joined to celebrate 25 years of Pro Football Talk, a run that began with a $500 website setup fee, a $50 monthly server bill, and a brief 48-hour retirement after the Vikings lost to Seattle. The anniversary gift is a rewritten *Quarterback of the Future*, posted one chapter at a time, which means the internet may soon get answers about Lonnie that it did not necessarily request.
Florio’s Week 6 label was “Corrections Sunday,” and he nominated Chargers-Chiefs as the game most likely to destroy everyone’s carefully prepared narratives. He also predicted that an 0-6 Chargers team would lead to somebody getting fired, from Mike McDaniel all the way up to Jim Harbaugh.
Mike FlorioThe Chargers could beat the Chiefs on Correction Sunday
Could it be something as drastic as the Chargers beating the Chiefs, the Chiefs at four and oh, the Chargers at oh and five? I think it's only been three times since the merger that a team four and oh or better has lost to a team oh and four or worse.
The serious portion of the interview covered Josh Jacobs, whose legal situation has Florio convinced the NFL will want to see the video before allowing him back. Florio was similarly skeptical about Tyreek Hill returning anytime soon. Then he pulled a gun-to-the-head prediction out of nowhere: Travis Kelce will be calling NFL games next year, and Tony Romo may have already called his last one.
Mike FlorioJosh Jacobs may not play again until the NFL sees the video
If I'm the NFL, my position is, hey man, you're not playing again until we see this. ... I think that's gonna keep this paid leave extended beyond Week 6 for Josh Jacobs.
Mike FlorioTravis Kelce will be in an NFL broadcast booth next year
Travis Kelce. ... I think he's gonna be in a booth somewhere next year. I think they're all gonna want him.
Florio also gave the Brian Flores situation a grim reading, arguing that Flores can be the best defensive coordinator in football and still be treated as radioactive by NFL ownership while his lawsuit continues. His broader diagnosis of the league was even sharper: billion-dollar franchises are often run like family food trucks, with no test required to own one.
Mike FlorioNFL teams are run like family-owned food trucks
These businesses are worth 10, 12, 15 billion dollars each. They're operated like a family-owned food truck for crying out loud. It's a mom-and-pop situation. ... There's no test you have to take, zero tests to own an NFL team.
And because Florio remains Florio, he took up the fight for the Sunday Ticket customer who missed the opening minutes of 49ers-Seahawks because of a blackout rule. Somewhere in the league office, a communications employee saw his inbox light up and quietly whispered, “fucking Florio.”
Fyre Fest: Battery Life, Beard Dandruff, and a Phantom Bat
Hank’s phone began dying at a suspiciously rapid rate, prompting the usual debate over whether Apple is throttling old phones or simply demanding tribute. Big Cat then revealed that he has so many apps he searches for them in the App Store every time he needs one. This was immediately followed by a tutorial on swiping down, a devastating reminder that PMT is now old enough to need basic iPhone training.
Hank also discovered beard dandruff on a black shirt after a callout video, then admitted he had eaten spaghetti and meatballs at work. PFT lost a $55 Velcro wallet in Michigan and blamed Hank for a wallet disappearance from 2016. Zac’s Fyre Fest was a phantom bat that hit him in the face at 3:30 a.m., leading to an hour and a half of searching for a rabid animal that almost certainly never existed.
The show closed with numbers, birthdays, a missed Dante acknowledgment, and Big Cat trying to get Memes to say “I love you” back. Memes responded with “okay,” which may be the coldest fourth-quarter performance of the entire episode.
