PMT DB
PMT DB
NFL Week 7: Ravens Demolish Lions, Dolphins Fraud Watch, and Tyson Bagent SZN
Week 7 was a glorious mess of coordination and chaos. We started with what was supposed to be the heavyweight fight of the early window, but turned into a total coordination of the Baltimore Ravens being very much for real. Lamar Jackson looked like MVP Lamar without even needing to use his legs, slicing up the Lions' secondary like they were still playing in a dome.
Big CatThe Ravens are a true Super Bowl contender
If the Ravens could ever figure out that step on the throat mentality, they could be a true Super Bowl contender. And this was the first game where it's like they went, you know, playing against a very good Lions team and completely obliterated.
Big Cat and PFT Commenter are officially all-in on Baltimore. While everyone was busy crowning the Lions, the Ravens reminded the world that they have the defense and the weapons to actually step on a throat when they need to. Lamar Jackson’s dominance against the NFC is becoming a statistical anomaly that PFT is ready to retire on.
PFT CommenterI am betting on Lamar Jackson against the NFC for the rest of my life
Did you know that Lamar is 16 and 1 against the NFC? ... I'm gonna take Lamar against the NFC for the rest of my life. After I heard that stat.
Meanwhile, in Foxborough, the Lighthouse era has officially begun. Bill Belichick notched his 300th win and apparently a secret contract extension that was leaked right as the Patriots finally looked like a professional football team. The Bills, on the other hand, are officially in the danger zone. Josh Allen and the offense look clunky, the defense is decimated by injuries, and they’re consistently falling behind early.
PFT CommenterThe Bills are just not a very good football team right now
I think I figured out what's wrong with the Bills. I think they just might not be a very good football team right now. ... they have Josh Allen and Josh Allen kicks ass. But he's not playing his best right now. The defense isn't playing their best right now. I think the Bills just aren't a very good team.
One of the most insane games of the day happened in Indy, where Miles Garrett was playing like a created character with the sliders turned all the way up. He had two sacks, two forced fumbles, and a blocked field goal where he literally just jumped over the line. Despite the Browns' win, the Colts continue to be the team that won't go away, even with Gardner Minsu’s chaotic energy leading the charge.
Big CatThe Colts are the 'friskiest' team in the NFL
The fact that they're, they might be the friskiest team in the NFL. They're a well-coached team. They're frisky. They've won against some good opponents. It feels like they're in every game and they don't make a, I mean they made a bunch of mistakes today... but the Colts might be my friskiest team.
Over in the Meadowlands, PFT is officially in 'blow it all up' mode. The Commanders lost a disgusting 14-7 game to the Giants where the only thing more depressing than the score was the offensive line play. Sam Howell is on pace to be sacked roughly 400 times this season, and Jonathan Allen’s post-game quote about being 'tired of this shit' is basically the new team anthem.
PFT CommenterThe Commanders should sell everyone and trade both Chase Young and Montez Sweat
I'm in blow it all up mode. I'm in, I'm in Trade everybody mode. This is a bad team. ... Trade both of 'em now. ... I'm in full tank mode.
To make matters worse for Daniel Jones fans, Tyrod Taylor actually looked decisive and capable of moving the ball downfield, something the $40 million man hasn't consistently done all year.
Big CatTyrod Taylor is statistically better than Daniel Jones
Tyrod Taylor had 279 yards, 9.6 yards per attempt and two touchdowns. Daniel Jones in 59 starts has never in one game gone over all three of those. That's crazy.
In Chicago, the Tyson Bagent story is officially legendary. The undrafted D-II kid from Shepherd University came in and managed a clean, efficient game to beat the Raiders. While it’s not a quarterback controversy yet, Big Cat is at least happy to go to sleep without feeling like his team is the biggest piece of shit in the league for one night.
Big CatTyson Bagent is a competent NFL backup quarterback
I think he might've actually proven that he could, he's a competent backup quarterback in the league. That should, should stick around for a while. So I'm happy for him.
We wrapped up with a Sunday Night Football showdown between the Dolphins and the Eagles. The Kelly Green jerseys were the real winners, but the Dolphins' reputation took a massive hit. They can put up 70 on the Broncos, but when they run into a physical, playoff-caliber defense, they look like a completely different team.
Big CatThe Dolphins are frauds until they beat a real team
I am of the firm believer. I love watching the Dolphins play football. They're very fun. They are on my fraud list until they beat a real team. ... they have played two teams that are at least playoff worthy teams in the Bills and the Eagles and got smoked.
Jake Marsh tried to middle the conversation by calling their upcoming game in Germany a 'must compete,' which is peak Nerd SZN terminology that the rest of the crew immediately flagged as loser talk. Big Cat is even taking it a step further, suggesting that right now, the Jets might actually be the superior team in that division because they don't fold when things get physical.
Big CatThe Jets are a better team than the Dolphins right now
I think the Jets are better than the Dolphins right now. ... I think the Jets play a style of football the Dolphins cannot play it. ... Good physical defenses is seems like it's [the Dolphins'] kryptonite. ... The Jets would maybe fuck up the Dolphins.
Between the NFL slate and a wild weekend of playoff baseball that saw Jose Altuve remind everyone why he's the most clutch hitter in the game, it was a massive weekend for sports. We also learned that new producer Shane has the palate of a picky toddler, which will surely be a recurring topic of investigation.
If the Dolphins don't want to be called frauds, they should probably try beating a team with a winning record before Christmas.
