Paul Lo Duca

The Raptors are a joke of a franchise

I got a little heat back from my take the other day that the Raptors are just a joke of a franchise. I don't mean it in a mean way. It's just facts are facts. When you think of the Raptors, you think of Vince Carter winning a dunk title and then getting swept.

The Celtics could beat the Cavaliers if LeBron James gets hurt

That's kind of what Hank said last week about the Celtics, that they could beat the Cavs if LeBron James got hurt. [Hank]: True.

The Rockets-Spurs series will go seven games

The Rockets-Spurs, it will go 6 or 7. It will go 7. I'm going to say it right now. It's going to go 7 because Hank's whole theory of teams only winning at home.

The Capitals will win Game 6 and then lose the series in Game 7 in D.C.

The Caps are probably going to win on Monday night. Of course. And then they're going to lose on Wednesday night in D.C. In a brutal fashion.

Sidney Crosby is going to destroy the Capitals

And Sidney Crosby, make no mistake about it, is going to be heavily involved in the destruction of the Capitals.

John Daly's career has been awesome and if you think otherwise you're a hater

My favorite take is when people say, oh, what a shame, John Daly's career. He really could have had it all. John Daly has had it all. His career actually has been awesome. If you think otherwise, then you're just a hater.

Bees aren't actually dying at an alarming rate

And people keep saying that they're dying at an alarming rate like you did. But I don't think that they are. I'm woke on the whole bee thing, the whole bee scare of 2016.

The Volkswagen commercial with the grandmother and the ashes is fake and manipulative

Volkswagen... they're like, well, we'll just put a really sappy story where a bunch of kids cry and an old grandmother, and we'll put some Simon and Garfunkel behind it, and everyone will say, oh my God, Volkswagen, they're so nice. Don't fall for it.

Barry Bonds is the best player that ever stepped foot in a batter's box

Barry Bonds is not even remotely close. Remotely close is the best player that ever stepped foot in a box. That guy, when the ball was an inch outside, he knew it. Steroids doesn't give you Superman eyes.

MLB locker rooms shouldn't allow bloggers or fanboys inside

They're letting a lot of people in the clubhouses that shouldn't be in the clubhouses... They're letting guys in there that have no fucking clue. Fanboys. I don't respect those guys until they give me the respect back.

Wade Davis is better than Aroldis Chapman if he can stay healthy

Wade Davis is better than Aroldis Chapman if he can stay healthy. And I know that's a big if... if he can stay healthy, he is probably the best closer in baseball.

If you claim you were hacked on Twitter, you should tweet vile things to make it look real

If you want to say you got hacked... before you do that just start tweeting out the craziest most vile swastikas dick pics own it just get go insane the weird links... It's so easy to actually fake like you got hacked instead of just saying, whoops, I got hacked.

If something is more expensive, that means it's better

If something's more expensive, that means it's better, right? Correct. Without a doubt. Like Fyre Fest tickets. That was the best concert of all time.

My book 'How to Win a Fist Fight' would just be a hollowed-out book with a knife inside

We are going to sell a book called How to Win a Fist Fight, and it's just inside the book. It's carved out, and it's just a knife... Step one, take this knife out. Step two, stab the guy in the face. Step three, you won your fist fight.