PMT DB
PMT DB
Tito Ortiz and Lenny Dykstra on MMA, Stocks, and LA Football
Friday the 13th brought some spooky energy to the show as Los Angeles officially became a two-team town. The Chargers decided to pack their bags for LA without really asking permission, creating a roommate dynamic that Big Cat thinks is going to be incredibly awkward for everyone involved at the StubHub Center.
Big CatThe Chargers moving to LA is like a friend crashing on your couch for a couple years
The chargers didn't even tell the rams they just told twitter... 'whoops hey guys in the rams, we're gonna crash on your couch for a couple years is that okay? ... maybe we'd go halvesies on your apartment ... let us use your stadium. I'll buy you an In-N-Out burger on Friday night.'
While the Chargers are crashing on the couch, the Rams decided to go in a completely different direction with their coaching search. Moving on from the Jeff Fisher era, they hired 30-year-old Sean McVay, a move that makes everyone over the age of 30 feel like a complete failure.
Big CatHiring Sean McVay is the NFL equivalent of a 45-year-old divorcé finding an 18-year-old with fake boobs
It's basically if you're married and you're like 45 years old and you get divorced, the next thing you do is you find an 18-year-old with like fake boobs, no job, that sort of thing... you'd go for the opposite [of Jeff Fisher].
Even with all the new talent in LA, Big Cat and PFT aren't exactly convinced that the city is a new football powerhouse. PFT is still waiting to see if they could even compete in the worst division in football.
PFT CommenterA combined roster of the Rams and Chargers would still not be able to win the AFC South
With a combined roster of the best players from the Rams and the Chargers, could Los Angeles win the AFC South? No.
Divisional Round Preview
The D-word round is here, and the guys are looking at a weekend full of coaching tree drama. PFT is firmly on the Falcons bandwagon as they prepare to host the Seahawks, believing that the regular season success will finally translate to a deep playoff run for Matty Ice.
PFT CommenterI'm taking the Falcons over the Seahawks because this is Matt Ryan's MVP year
I'm taking the Falcons. I'm laying the points. This is Matt Ryan's year. High-flying offense. Matt Ryan, MVP guy. His year.
In the AFC, the Texans are traveling to Foxborough to face the Patriots. While most people see this as a blowout, the guys are looking at the "Agent X" files. Big Cat is convinced that Bill Belichick has a deep state operation running against every single one of his former assistants to ensure they never beat him.
PFT CommenterBill Belichick keeps blackmail files and secret surveillance videos on all his former coaches
I bet you Bill Belichick keeps files, and he not only does that, but he installs videotapes in their homes, he pulls a big Putin move, and he observes them, and he has dirt on all his coaches. Any coach that leaves him, he's got blackmail.
There is a silver lining for Houston, though. The defense has looked surprisingly stout lately, leading to a discussion about whether or not J.J. Watt was actually holding the unit back with his various cabin-based training montages and system-end play.
PFT CommenterThe Texans defense is actually better without J.J. Watt
But the one silver lining for all you Texans fans out there, we've had rumblings. Texans defense might be better without J.J. Watt. Oh, it definitely is. He's a system D-end.
Moving to the Sunday slate, the Chiefs host the Steelers in a game that basically comes down to whether Andy Reid has had enough snacks and naps to be prepared. PFT argues that a rested Reid is the peak version of the coaching profession.
PFT CommenterAndy Reid is the greatest coach of all time as long as he has a bye week to rest
Andy Reid off a bye is the greatest coach of all time. It's a classic fat guy behavior. You just need to rest a little. Just give me a minute to catch my breath, a week to catch my breath. And I'll mentally be ready.
The biggest game of the weekend features the Packers heading to Dallas. The drama isn't just on the field, but on the sideline, where Tony Romo is lurking like a handsome ghost waiting for Dak Prescott to throw a single incomplete pass.
PFT CommenterTony Romo on the sideline will be a huge distraction for Dak Prescott in the playoffs
Romo getting FaceTime every time Dak screws up just a little bit is going to be delicious. Tony on the sideline, and Dak throws an early interception, or the Packers go up a little bit. Show me Tony Romo. Show me Tony Romo. Troy Aikman's going to talk about it.
Big Cat has an even more specific reason for backing the Packers. He thinks Aaron Rodgers is going to see Dak Prescott's wholesome family stories and take it as a personal insult to his own famously estranged family dynamic.
Big CatThe Packers will beat the Cowboys because Aaron Rodgers will be motivated by how much Dak Prescott loves his family
I'm taking the Packers... if you read the USA Today article about Dak Prescott... it was him talking about his family. That is bulletin board material for Aaron Rodgers, right? Oh, Mr. Big Shot with the family. Oh, you talk to the family? ... You don't send your family all your Christmas gifts back two months later in a totally normal move?
The Guests: Lenny Dykstra and Tito Ortiz
The long-awaited Lenny Dykstra interview finally happened, and it was every bit the disaster that was promised. Lenny seemed to be in a different dimension, giving out financial advice that suggests he’s done with the stock market entirely after a few "controversial" losses.
Lenny DykstraI would not be buying any stocks right now and would put money into real estate instead
I wouldn't be buying any stock right now. [Put money in] Real estate. Hookers? ... That's a dead end road, dude. I'm over a million in those places. There's no return on anything.
Things stayed intense when Tito Ortiz joined the show to talk about his upcoming fight with friend of the program Chael Sonnen. Tito didn't hold back on his opponent, questioning Chael's legendary status and his grasp on reality.
Tito OrtizChael Sonnen is a compulsive liar who needs rehab to stop lying
That's a lie from Chael. He's a compulsive liar. The guy needs to go to rehab to stop lying. He's a compulsive liar. And his father's turning over in his grave right now.
Tito also weighed in on the potential boxing match between Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather. While many think it's a publicity stunt, Tito thinks the money is too good for Floyd to pass up, even if it's a total mismatch in the ring.
Tito OrtizConor McGregor has zero chance of beating Floyd Mayweather in a boxing match
Floyd wants an easy $100 million check. ... Conor McGregor versus Floyd Mayweather, I think it's going to happen. ... [Conor has] 1,000% no chance at all. Floyd wouldn't last 30 seconds [in MMA]... Floyd will last a minute because he'd run for 30 seconds.
Grumors and Piss Rankings
In a special segment inspired by recent political headlines, the guys ranked the all-time best "piss guys," featuring R. Kelly, Ozzy Osbourne, and the tiny fish that swims up your urethra in the Amazon. The discussion naturally led to Grumors, where Jim Irsay is reportedly spending more time on Twitter than actually managing his football team.
Big CatJim Irsay forgets he owns the Colts and is just doing Twitter giveaways all day
I don't think he is [going to fire anyone]. I think he just forgot he owned the Colts. He's just on Twitter all day. He's just been doing Twitter giveaways every day. He's like, 'hey, Jim, you still own this team? You get to make the decisions.'
To wrap things up, PFT is looking ahead to a big January for the Washington Capitals. In what has become an annual tradition, he is fully convinced that this is the year they stay hot and finally get over the hump, because the regular season never lies.
PFT CommenterThe Capitals are regular season heroes who always look awesome in January
And I know not only is the Capitals year, but the Capitals in January, this is when they get hot. This is when they beat teams. You can count on the Capitals in the regular season to look awesome.
Hopefully, Lenny Dykstra doesn't sue us before the next episode.
