Jilly Football

Czechoslovakia is the original home of goulash

They say the Czech Republic or Czechoslovakia originally is the home of goulash.

I am disappointed in Big Cat's flip-flopping on being an anti-vaxxer

I'm a little disappointed in your flip-flopping with anti-vax. [...] If you're going to pick a side, you have to stick to it. [...] What kind of example are you setting for your son without succumbing to peer pressure?

Licorice is the best jelly bean to give to someone you hate

What are the best flavors of jelly beans to give to someone you hate? Oh, definitely licorice. Yep. You can have them all.

Laptops should be abolished

If you could change any one thing in today's world back to how it was when you were in your 20s, what would it be? I would go without laptops. Get rid of laptops. I can't figure out a laptop. I barely can figure out a phone.

The Bachelorette having four fantasy suite dates instead of three is a smart life hack

Hannah couldn't decide who to give the final rose to... so she gave them both a rose, which means Hannah will have four fantasy suite dates instead of three... She just hacked the bachelorette by having more sex. She was like i realized that i could get more laid than other bachelorettes

Christian Yelich is not a true home run hitter because he's too skinny

Yellich sucks. He's not good enough to win a home run derby. I still, even a year later, even though he's, like, got 31 home runs or whatever. He doesn't have a home run swing. No, he does not. He's too skinny.

The best way to move up in your grandmother's power rankings is to move in and take care of her

Move in and take care of grandma. Oh, absolutely... and she will love you and you will move right to the top of the pile.

Ladybugs are good luck and you should never eat them

Are you sure [the bug eater is] not one of you? ... He started eating ladybugs. Well, no, you don't eat ladybugs. Ladybugs are luck. They're good luck.

I like both the 49ers and the Seahawks, but if I have to pick one, it's the 49ers

Professional football teams would have to be the 49ers... and the Seahawks. [If you have to pick one?] I have to be the 49ers. I love Joe Montana. [College?] Go blue. Michigan.