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Void
Stavros HalkiasStavros Halkias

The Ravens lost to the Bills because they failed to run Derrick Henry on the goal line

Why the fuck did we throw the ball? And when we were first in goal, where the fuck did we run it four times? Why the fuck did we bring Derrick Henry if we're goal line and they're not gonna throw the fucking ball?

While the loss is factual, the cause (play-calling vs player error) is an opinion.

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Win
Jan 22, 2025
#12338
Big CatBig Cat

Ohio State was the best team in the inaugural 12-team playoff

Ohio State has done it. $20 million roster. Incredible team... they kicked the shit out of everyone in the playoffs. They were the best team in this playoffs.

Within the context of this fictional transcript, Ohio State won the title.
Void
Jan 22, 2025
#12339
Big CatBig Cat

The National Championship game should be played no later than January 10th

January 10th should be the latest they play the national championship. You can't have it. You can't have four NFL teams left and still not have a national title champion for college football. It just feels weird. It feels off. It's stupid.

This is a subjective scheduling preference.
Void
Jan 22, 2025
#12340
Big CatBig Cat

Hiring Ben Johnson literally changes everything for the Bears and they are 'all the way back'

If I were to say what I was gonna really feel... I would say that hiring Ben Johnson literally changes everything about this franchise and it's all the way back... This hire is so different than what, what the Bears are usually able to pull off. And he was, and the guy's a fucking boy genius.

The Bears did hire Johnson, but the 'all the way back' status is subjective and depends on future results.

More from Stavros Halkias

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Void
Stavros HalkiasStavros Halkias

The Patriots shouldn't be allowed to have a good quarterback like Drake Maye immediately after Bill Belichick.

It fucking kills me that the Patriots are good... the fact that these cocksuckers get a good core, I, it's like... they don't deserve a good quarterback immediately. If Drake Maye developed schizophrenia and he is only good half the time and you don't know which personality's playing, they deserve that.

This is an expression of comedic spite toward a rival team.
Void
Stavros HalkiasStavros Halkias

Turkey is a 'peasant bird' and doesn't belong on the Thanksgiving table

I'm not fucking settling for peasant for the peasant bird. Thank you very much... Turkey is dog shit. You guys don't know how cook Turkey.

Subjective opinion on food preference.
Loss
Stavros HalkiasStavros Halkias

The Ravens will win the Super Bowl as a Wild Card underdog

Yes, of course. They're winning the Super Bowl. It's faded to be, we're going as the fucking wild card... we're gonna fucking get revenge on everyone. This will be, this is how it's done.

The Ravens made the playoffs but lost to the Chiefs in the Divisional Round; they did not win the Super Bowl.

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