I would watch an NFL player flag football tournament in the off-season

If they do it correctly, it would be like a perfect, like, I wanna say May — just do like a three day tournament with all the players. I would watch that for flag football. If it was the NFL players playing, I would watch that.

The NFL replacing 'End Racism' stencils in the end zone means racism has been officially defeated

We ended racism. No more 'End Racism' in the end zone. It only took four years. 2021 we decided let's do something... we fucking painted that shit in end zones and we did it and we put it on the backs of helmets and now racism's dead. Done. Choose love is also gone. We're choosing hate... calling time out to hate now so that you can get better at hating when you get back.

Myles Garrett is right to want out of Cleveland to win a Super Bowl

Myles Garrett has requested a trade. Cleveland Browns fans — sucks for them... but also Myles Garrett, he does probably have a few good years left and he wants to win a Super Bowl. He's 29. He's still really fucking good.

The Sixers are a bad team that loses every game Joel Embiid doesn't play

The Sixers suck. The Sixers are a bad team. Embiid's not playing. They lose—the Sixers are back to losing every game that Embiid doesn't play.

My 'dinner simulator' habit of building food orders and not buying them is a sign of good self-control

Instead of going and making myself a snack or making myself food or ordering food, I'll just pull up the apps, Uber Eats... and I'll just like put together an order of what I would order if I were to get something. And then I clear my cart and I go to bed... It's really good self-control.

Bryce Harper will return to being a beast this season after disrespect from his GM

Bryce Harper's been nothing but good. And Dave Dombrowski disrespecting him like that. Bryce has every right to be upset about that. ... I think he's gonna be a beast this year. He's gonna return to being a beast.