Justin Tucker would be a first-round draft pick today

If Justin Tucker was in the draft tomorrow, he has to be first rounder. And I know that sounds crazy. Someone has to, some stat nerd has to do like a deep dive on just the amount of points that the Ravens get in terms of edge wise. The fact that they're the minute they get past the 50 yard line, it's like, alright. As long as we don't turn the ball over, it's an automatic three points.

The Colts are the 'AFC Vikings'

The Colts are just the AFC Vikings at this point where every single game you watch it. And you're like, this team is good. They can beat anyone, but they will eventually find a way to fuck up at the worst possible time.

Rob Gronkowski is the most important player on the Buccaneers' offense

I think this puts to rest the conversation of who's the most important player on that Bucs offense. I think it's Gronk. Because they can do this without AB. They still looked not great in that first half.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?