I feel bad for Carson Wentz for the first time

PFT I did not think this was possible, but after watching Thursday night football, I can officially say I feel bad for Carson. It was a pretty depressing watch for Carson Wentz... I didn't think I could feel those feelings for Carson Wentz tonight watching him in pain, just getting sacked over and over.

Carson Wentz suffered a dislocated shoulder or labrum injury on TNF

I'm gonna speculate that [Carson Wentz] had some sort of dislocated shoulder issue. Maybe a labrum. Maybe rotator cuff. And it wasn't staying in place and it just kept getting popped out over and over and over again.

The Vikings are in a bad spot because they have the hardest remaining schedule after starting with the easiest.

The Vikings... have played the number one easiest schedule this year thus far. And they have the number one hardest schedule the rest of the season. So it feels like the Vikings could be in a bad spot.

Fettuccine Alfredo is fake Italian food.

Alfredo's not real Italian. There's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine. Alfredo's fake Italian. He [Rick Pitino] would maybe do a lemon chicken, maybe do a lemon chicken Piccata. But Alfredo... Cacho e pepe, that's Italian. But there's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine.

The Sixers are a bad team that loses every game Joel Embiid doesn't play

The Sixers suck. The Sixers are a bad team. Embiid's not playing. They lose—the Sixers are back to losing every game that Embiid doesn't play.

My 'dinner simulator' habit of building food orders and not buying them is a sign of good self-control

Instead of going and making myself a snack or making myself food or ordering food, I'll just pull up the apps, Uber Eats... and I'll just like put together an order of what I would order if I were to get something. And then I clear my cart and I go to bed... It's really good self-control.