Jack Del Rio is like a gambler on a heater who just lost all his money

Jack Del Rio, he's your friend who got on a heater and was like, no, no, no, don't worry, guys. I'm still up. I'm still up. And then you look and he's lost all his money.

Derek Carr is a soft Cali boy who chokes in the cold

Derek Carr, not [a cold-weather quarterback]. No, in fact, he's a cold-weather choker. He played, what, at Fresno State? Cali boy. Soft. Can't trust the soft Cali boys.

Alex Smith is better in the cold because it makes every quarterback equally shitty

Alex Smith, he's better in the cold. Well, I don't want to say he's better in the cold. It's like he's kind of shitty just in general. But when it gets cold outside, it's the great equalizer because everyone's shit.

Will Grier is the best player in college football

I don't know where that [big balls narrative] come from, honestly, because I got the best player in college football in Will Grier, so those decisions are pretty easy.

The Big 12 needs a championship game to avoid being shunned by the playoff committee

The 13th game. That's important. ... if [Oklahoma] could have won their last nine games and then played in a championship game, another high-profile game, I think matters. Those guys that play 13 games and they get hot, they have an opportunity to be able to move up. And the Big 12 has fixed that. So next year at this time we'll be playing a championship game.

Brandon Weeden's NFL career was ruined by being drafted by the Browns

Brandon Weeden's pretty much the same way. ... fortunately he got drafted by the Browns. That'll do it to your career. It didn't quite work out.