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Big CatBig Cat

Ben Simmons is the greatest basketball player who cannot score of all time

He went six points, 15 rebounds, 15 assists. He might be the greatest basketball player who cannot score of all time. He's broken the game. He can't score. You would think that it would be impossible for a guy that is bad at shooting to be an elite basketball player. But he's somehow figured out a way to be insanely good at basketball while also not scoring points.

While subjective, Simmons' refusal to score in the Hawks series later that year solidified this reputation.

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May 24, 2021
#27919
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Phil Mickelson's victory is the 'Burning Man for Gen Xers'

Standing next to Phil Mickelson, like what you saw in the 18th hole, that's Burning Man for Gen Xers. That's as close as they'll get to taking drugs and going to a music festival and discovering their inner selves for three days.

Subjective comparison of fan demographics and cultural impact.
Loss
May 24, 2021
#9488
HankHank

Brooks Koepka would have won the PGA Championship by 15 strokes if his knee was healthy

[Brooks Koepka's] knee is hurting him, and he wasn't able to get all the way low to read putts, and the putter is what kind of killed him today and this weekend. So Ipso facto, he probably would have won this tournament by 15 strokes if his knee was okay.

Koepka finished tied for second, two strokes behind Mickelson. There is no way to verify he would have won by 15 strokes.
Win
May 24, 2021
#9490
HankHank

The Celtics vs. Nets series is basically over after Game 1

Obviously, the Celtics lost. That first half, though. They had a great first half. They had a chance. Kemba Walker played terribly in the second half, and the series is basically over. Sweep. Maybe gentlemen's sweep.

The Nets won the series 4-1, which is a 'Gentlemen's Sweep.'

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Big CatBig Cat

The Vikings officially have a Kyler Murray problem

I think we can officially say they have a Kyler Murray problem. Justin Jefferson has reached his point where he's like, 'What the fuck is going on?' So that would be my point. Maybe there's a Kyler Murray issue.

Whether Minnesota had a significant Kyler Murray problem is an evaluative football judgment rather than a definitively resolvable fact.
Open
Big CatBig Cat

The Vikings should trade for Kirk Cousins

What if I told you the Vikings could trade for a quarterback that has 18 touchdown passes and a rushing touchdown? Would that be something you think you'd be interested in if you were a Minnesota Viking fan? Kirk Cousins.

Whether Kirk Cousins was traded to Minnesota during the 2026 season is not established by the transcript or reliably known here.
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Big CatBig Cat

Jalen Warren is a top-five running back

Jalen Warren is the top five running back this year. And it's like watching him play, that changes what I think about the Steelers.

Top-five running back status is ultimately a subjective ranking that cannot be definitively resolved.