Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?

Trent Williams is the rare offensive lineman who is actually fun to watch play

Trent Williams is a joy to have on your team. He's just a fucking bully. He's also the rare offensive lineman where you have fun watching him play. Like after the ball was snapped, my eyes would just go to Trent Williams because it's like this guy, we might throw an interception, but Trent Williams might punch a guy in the throat.

Joe Schoen is effectively fired if he has to publicly clarify that he hasn't been fired

If you ever have to describe the fact that, like, by the way, I'm not fired. You're pretty much fired. Right? Nobody has ever said, 'Hey, just so you know, technically I'm not fired,' and then they got an extension after that.

Pigeons are the smartest birds because they live off human trash

Pigeons might be the smartest bird. There is one... they've essentially just over the years been like, Hey, you know where we should live? Right where the people leave their trash. We don't have to hunt for anything. We don't have to go fucking diving for worms and fish... Some guy's going to eat a calzone and not finish it and we're gonna finish it. So pigeons might be the smartest bird.

Barry Bonds could still play in the MLB and take a million walks because of fear

I think of that with Barry Bonds for sure. Barry Bonds I like He could just, he, he could show up and just be awesome and, and take like a million walks. 'cause people would fear him.

American air conditioning is the equivalent of 'Hunter Biden crack' for European visitors

I would imagine air conditioning for Europeans hits like crack. Like the best crack of all. Oh, hunter Biden crack. Yeah. That's like when we go over to, to Spain and we see a nude beach. Like that's, that, that feeling that we get over there is their feeling when they're walking into one of our buildings over here.