Baker Mayfield will be a successful quarterback for the Cleveland Browns

I actually think this [Baker Mayfield] is going to work, and I know that's like stepping out on a very, very thin branch saying a Browns quarterback that they drafted really high might actually work, but I like Baker Mayfield. I like him a lot. I think that he is a very, very good quarterback and I like the competitiveness.

Josh Allen is a perfect fit for the Buffalo Bills because he has big hands for the cold weather

I think that's a great fit for Bills Mafia. I think it's a great fit for, you know, people forget it's cold. Cold, windy, snowy up there. Big hands. Josh Allen checks off all those boxes. Fucking awesome.

Jon Gruden is drafting like he is officially drunk

John Gruden is officially drunk. John Gruden traded the 10th pick for the 15th pick. So he moved back five spots in the draft and only picked up a third and a fifth... and then he picked a guy [Kolton Miller] who everyone said would be like a third or fourth rounder.

The Lions will win the NFC North

I think they're gonna be really good. Are the Lions on Crosby watch? ... I think them and maybe the Cowboys might be on Crosby watch. ... I think they probably will win the NFC North.

The Bears could have a top-five offense even if they miss the playoffs

There's a world where the Bears don't make the playoffs, but they're a top-five offense. And our defense is so bad that I can almost—I would be very upset, but I could deal with it.

The Jaguars could win the AFC South

I think the Jaguars are not getting any respect or talked about a lot. I think they're gonna be really good this year. They could win the South. I think Trevor Lawrence is gonna keep going forward.