I want to be replaced by a parrot if I die in Cleveland

If I do die in Cleveland... I want a parrot... play old episodes of Pardon My Take for the parrot... put it in front of a microphone and you talk to it and it'll just basically do the same shitty takes that we've done for the past three months. Nobody will even know that it's not me anymore.

Phil Mickelson choked away another major championship

Anytime you got Phil [Mickelson] finishing in second, the storyline is Phil Mickelson choked away another one. Let's focus where it needs to be because it's always fun to make fun of Phil for being always the bridesmaid, never the bride guy.

Rory McIlroy's tight shirts and muscle mass are hurting his golf game

I think it's probably the most correct take I've ever heard dude you ever hear of popcorn muscles yeah that's what [Rory McIlroy] has got. And if you think about a golf swing actually wearing a really tight shirt probably has some effect on it right?

Josh Allen is playing quarterback on easy mode

We're a Josh Allen podcast. People sometimes get upset about how much we glaze him. I don't think we glaze him enough because he's playing quarterback on easy mode. It looks like that for him. The flick of the wrist, the runs, everything—it all looks like the game is slowed down for him. He's in just total control of the game.

Week 1 underdogs that failed to cover are a 70% ATS trend in Week 2

Teams that failed to cover the spread in Week 1 and enter Week 2 as underdogs have gone 26-11-2 against the spread since 2014. Seventy percent.

The Bears will beat the Vikings, but they won't score 59 again

I think the Bears are gonna win. I do not think they're gonna score 59 points. I do think they're gonna win.