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Void
Mar 9, 2016·War Comparisons
#22581
Big CatBig Cat

The Green Bay Packers are the Vietnam of the NFL because they only use homegrown talent and no one wants to play there.

My team is the Packers. They are Vietnam. And simply because... all homegrown talent. They don't make a lot of splashy moves. You really don't want to go play there. You're never going to like, you're never like, Oh, I want to go play at Lambeau. I want to go play, you know, have a war in Vietnam.

Purely satirical comparison.

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Win
Mar 9, 2016
#9744
Big CatBig Cat

The Jaguars will sign a big free agent like Chris Ivory, cut him in two years because he didn't work out, and keep sucking.

The Jaguars have a ton of money, and everyone's going to say, wow, the Jaguars are going to make a big splash. Like, you know, like signing Chris Ivory in two years, they're going to cut him because he's like, he didn't work out and they're going to bring in a new coach and the Jaguars are going to keep sucking and it's going to be beautiful.

In March 2016, the Jaguars signed Chris Ivory to a 5-year, $32 million deal. He was released in February 2018 (exactly two years later) after failing to meet expectations. Coach Gus Bradley was also fired within that window.
Void
Mar 9, 2016
#9745
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I have zero confidence that any running back free agent signing by any team is going to play out

I have zero confidence that any running back free agent signing by any team is going to play out. But the Jaguars keep going back to that.

This is a general philosophy rather than a single testable event, but looking at 2016 RB signings (Ivory, Lamar Miller, DeMarco Murray), few provided long-term value.
Push
Mar 9, 2016
#9746
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Raiders will get good and then immediately move to L.A., totally screwing over the city of Oakland.

I think what's what's going to happen is you're going to see the Raiders get really good... or start to get good and then move to L.A. right as they get good and totally screw over the city of Oakland.

The Raiders did leave Oakland, but they moved to Las Vegas in 2020. They also had a 12-4 season in 2016 (getting 'good' as predicted) before the move was finalized.

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Void
Jul 17, 2026·Mt. Rushmore
#30966
Big CatBig Cat

Pigeons are the smartest birds because they live off human trash

Pigeons might be the smartest bird. There is one... they've essentially just over the years been like, Hey, you know where we should live? Right where the people leave their trash. We don't have to hunt for anything. We don't have to go fucking diving for worms and fish... Some guy's going to eat a calzone and not finish it and we're gonna finish it. So pigeons might be the smartest bird.

While funny, avian intelligence is usually measured by tool use (crows) or problem-solving, though urban adaptation is a form of intelligence.
Void
Jul 15, 2026
#30948
Big CatBig Cat

Barry Bonds could still play in the MLB and take a million walks because of fear

I think of that with Barry Bonds for sure. Barry Bonds I like He could just, he, he could show up and just be awesome and, and take like a million walks. 'cause people would fear him.

This is a hypothetical claim about a retired player's current ability, which is fundamentally subjective.
Void
Jul 15, 2026
#30949
Big CatBig Cat

American air conditioning is the equivalent of 'Hunter Biden crack' for European visitors

I would imagine air conditioning for Europeans hits like crack. Like the best crack of all. Oh, hunter Biden crack. Yeah. That's like when we go over to, to Spain and we see a nude beach. Like that's, that, that feeling that we get over there is their feeling when they're walking into one of our buildings over here.

Inherently subjective and hyperbolic comparison.