You can't take a shit at a friend's house if the bathroom is less than 30 'bathroom feet' away
It's actually a formula that you multiply the number of bathrooms times the feet from the couch to the bathroom. And if it's anything under 30, then you can't take a shit there. So if there's a bathroom 20 feet away from the couch, but there's only one bathroom in the whole house, you can't do it.
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This Bears defense can beat anyone. [The 20-0 halftime lead] feels like a pivotal era in the Bears history where it's like everything's going to be good from this point forward.
Ben Roethlisberger is bad now because he's too skinny
He's bad now that he's skinny. He doesn't know how to operate without all that extra padding around him. He just drops back, and since he doesn't have that padding, he's used to defensive ends just hitting him and bouncing off him or just being absorbed by his fat.
The Ravens are going to win the AFC North
The Ravens do look like a good football team. John Harbaugh is a week one gangster. Yeah, they're going to win that division.
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LeBron James is returning to the Cleveland Cavaliers for the third time
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