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Big CatBig Cat

Zion Williamson is always one bad weekend away from being fat

He is not fat, but he's always a bad weekend away from being fat. A bachelor party, going on a trip. Maybe a trip to New Orleans... you come into work on Monday and everyone looks at you like you got stung by a bunch of bees.

Weight and conditioning became recurring issues throughout Zion's early career, often sidelined by injury.

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Loss
Jan 24, 2020
#25302
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Enron is due for a massive comeback

A little investment tip, Enron. It's bound to bounce back. It has to. It is due.

Enron filed for bankruptcy in 2001 and its stock is worthless; it is not bouncing back.
Loss
Jan 24, 2020
#4138
Big CatBig Cat

Zion Williamson is a bonafide bust

Zion is a bust. Parentheses: I went to sleep at halftime.

Zion had an incredible second half in his debut and became an All-Star, proving this satirical take incorrect.
Loss
Jan 24, 2020
#4140
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Coach K is a bad X's and O's guy for not letting Zion shoot threes at Duke

Huge indictment on Coach K as an X's and O's guy. [Zion] hit four [threes] in a row... That's another feather in the cap of old Roy Williams. He would never screw up his prospects like that.

Zion only shot 33% from three at Duke on limited attempts; Coach K's decision was based on Zion's elite inside game. Declaring him a 'bad X's and O's guy' is a satirical stretch.

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Big CatBig Cat

The Lions will win the NFC North

I think they're gonna be really good. Are the Lions on Crosby watch? ... I think them and maybe the Cowboys might be on Crosby watch. ... I think they probably will win the NFC North.

The 2026 NFC North winner will determine whether this prediction was correct.
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Big CatBig Cat

The Bears could have a top-five offense even if they miss the playoffs

There's a world where the Bears don't make the playoffs, but they're a top-five offense. And our defense is so bad that I can almost—I would be very upset, but I could deal with it.

This resolves when the 2026 regular season ends and Chicago's offensive ranking and playoff status are known.
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Big CatBig Cat

The Jaguars could win the AFC South

I think the Jaguars are not getting any respect or talked about a lot. I think they're gonna be really good this year. They could win the South. I think Trevor Lawrence is gonna keep going forward.

The Jaguars' season and Trevor Lawrence's 2026 performance will determine the prediction.