The New England Patriots are dead (but they're still going to win the division)

The New England Patriots are dead. Actually, they're still going to win the division, but it's times like this I thank my lucky stars I'm not a New England Patriots fan.

Thin Andy Reid might be better than Bill Belichick

Thin Andy Reid—maybe all the fat was the dumb stuff that made him call timeouts at inopportune times. Thin Andy Reid might be better than Bill Belichick. Two and one. The Chiefs are two and one under Andy Reid against the Patriots.

Patrick Mahomes' presence has taught Alex Smith how to throw the long ball

Alex Smith, out of nowhere, showed that he can throw that long ball tonight. Pat Mahomes is like when you have an old male dog that has always pissed putting its hips down at the ground... and when you bring a new pup in that lifts its leg on something, your old dog's like, holy shit, that looks cool. Mahomes is a young pup that's taught Alex Smith to lift his leg.

Roman Anthony is a defensive liability for the Red Sox because everyone is successfully running on him in left field.

Roman Anthony, world baseball classic hero. But he has been, he's become a meme basically. If he can't, he just can't throw anyone out from left field. Everyone's just running on Roman. Shane tried to tell me he was great last year, but he was playing right field. Now he's playing left field... it's just not good.

AJ Brown will be traded to the New England Patriots

[AJ Brown is] gone no matter what... New England. [In my] unbiased mind, he's still gone.

UConn can't win the championship

I hope UConn can get it done. I don't think they can win it all.