Manny Machado is effectively early retiring by signing with the San Diego Padres

Manny Machado decided, guess what, 10 years, $300 million, San Diego, where I can kind of just go chill. Like, this is basically a – I'm just going to – he almost is early retiring.

Bryce Harper will sign a contract for more than $300 million

Manny Machado decided, guess what, 10 years, $300 million, San Diego... But it's only going to be [the biggest contract in sports history] for like two more days because Bryce Harper, if you don't think Scott Boras is getting Bryce Harper $301 million [you're crazy].

Dick Vitale is losing his edge as a college basketball commentator

I'm a big Dickie V fan. I'm okay that they took him off the [Duke vs. UNC] game. I think they did it a little early, but I will give a little bit of a hat tip to whoever decided it... I listened to Dickie V on Saturday and it's fading on us, boys. I don't want to say it, but he's kind of losing it.

Nate Oats would not be a great fit at UNC

I don't think he'd be a great fit there. Would people be talking about Nate Oats as much for this job if he didn't wear those jackets? They feel like Carolina jackets. It feels like he's been accepting people into anticipating him being the next UNC coach for a while.

James Wood will be a monster this season and hit 35 plus home runs

The only thing I have to look forward to this season is James Wood just being a fucking monster and getting 35 plus home runs. That's the only thing that I'm going to this season looking forward to as a Nats fan.

Tom Brady never processed 9/11 because he was such a psycho about football

He just had delayed onset grief. Anything that happened during his playing career, he never processed any of it outside of football. Tom Brady probably never processed 9/11. He was such a psycho, all he cared about was football. He probably found out about it like two years ago.