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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Attractive people shouldn't be good at anything because it makes them impossible to make fun of

If you're an attractive person, you shouldn't be good at anything. Give me one flaw that I can make fun of you for on Twitter and make me feel better as a person. [Brooks Koepka] has an attractive girlfriend. He just won like $3 million. He's attractive. He's the U.S. Open winner. Fuck this guy.

This is a purely subjective comedic stance on the correlation between attractiveness and talent.

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Loss
Jun 19, 2017
#18073
Big CatBig Cat

Brooks Koepka is too attractive to win a major tournament

[Brooks Koepka] is way too attractive to win any kind of major tournament. Usually you need a receding hairline, some Phil Mickelson man boobs, some Tiger Woods inner demons. Give me one flaw that I can make fun of you for on Twitter and make me feel better as a person.

Koepka ended up being one of the most dominant major champions of his era, winning five total majors despite his good looks.
Win
Jun 19, 2017
#18074
Big CatBig Cat

The U.S. Open course at Erin Hills was way too easy

The golf course lost. I expect more. I want to see the U.S. Open golf course. I want to see Jim Nance giving his tie to the course. Everyone was just hitting it right down the middle the whole time. Easiest golf course I've ever seen. So USGA, figure it out.

Erin Hills 2017 saw record low scores for a U.S. Open, with Koepka finishing at -16, supporting the idea that the course setup wasn't as punishing as traditional U.S. Opens.
Win
Jun 19, 2017
#18075
Big CatBig Cat

Ricky Fowler can't win a title wearing 'candy-ass' bright orange uniforms

We do have the theory that candy-ass uniforms can't win titles. So, are we a little nervous? He had that bright orange on Sunday. Maybe, like, I was just thinking, hey, is Ricky Fowler playing for the Dolphins? Because... This sucks.

Rickie Fowler has famously never won a major championship, often wearing his signature Sunday orange.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

England will beat the Netherlands and then lose a heartbreaking match to Argentina

I think England's gonna win this weekend. And then you'll have the realization that it might not actually be coming home after all... losing to Argentina at that stage, that would be the most heartbreaking loss they could possibly have.

Specific tournament outcome needs verification based on the actual 2026 bracket results.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Christian Pulisic is clearly not and cannot be the face of US soccer

I'm just sick of relying on him [Pulisic] to be the face of US soccer because it can't be, it's so clear that he's not.

This is a subjective evaluation of a player's leadership/status.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The 4-1 loss to Belgium was the worst USMNT performance in years

That was the worst performance from the US that I've seen in years. Just completely lackluster from the start. So much blame to go around. Tim Ream, friend of the program, good guy over the hill, turned into soccer Shawn Bradley before our very eyes got dunked on twice.

Subjective opinion on the quality of the performance.