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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Automatic weapons stop branches of government from becoming too powerful

What stops one branch of government from becoming too powerful? ... We also would have accepted automatic weapons. Automatic weapons do that, too.

This is a satirical interpretation of the Second Amendment's purpose.

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Jul 4, 2016
#345
Big CatBig Cat

Choking to death on a hot dog during a competition would be a hilarious way to die

I actually am OK if I die because I think that would be a hilarious way for me to die. You know what? God, take me, choke a hot dog down my throat, whatever.

This is an inherently subjective opinion about what constitutes a funny death.
Void
Jul 4, 2016
#346
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Big Cat's best hot dog strategy is to eat 6-7 dogs immediately to secure a legendary screen cap

You need to get out to a hot start, just like shovel six or seven hot dogs in your mouth at the start. And that way you've got the screen cap for the rest of your life that shows like Dan Katz, eight hot dogs, Joey Chestnut, two.

Win
Jul 4, 2016·Null
#27127
Big CatBig Cat

The Fourth of July is the drunkest weekend of the year

Fourth of July weekend is maybe the drunkest weekend of the year. Everyone's out. Everyone's summer. It really is like who can drink the most beers all weekend long.

While difficult to prove definitively, Fourth of July is consistently ranked among the top drinking holidays in the US.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

JMU may not win again until the dog-poop bettor returns

JMU probably won't win another football game until that guy logs back on.

The prediction resolves when JMU's 2026 football season ends or the team wins another game, whichever comes first.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Wizards are a one-through-eight seed team

I feel confident in my one through eight seed. Love that for the Wiz.

The Wizards' 2026-27 regular-season finish will determine whether this playoff-seeding prediction was accurate.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Falcons can expose the 49ers defense

They might not actually be as good as we think they are on defense. I don't hate the Falcons at all in this game.

The 49ers' 2026 defensive quality and this Week 7 result can be evaluated against the skepticism expressed here.