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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Automatic weapons stop branches of government from becoming too powerful

What stops one branch of government from becoming too powerful? ... We also would have accepted automatic weapons. Automatic weapons do that, too.

This is a satirical interpretation of the Second Amendment's purpose.

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Jul 4, 2016
#345
Big CatBig Cat

Choking to death on a hot dog during a competition would be a hilarious way to die

I actually am OK if I die because I think that would be a hilarious way for me to die. You know what? God, take me, choke a hot dog down my throat, whatever.

This is an inherently subjective opinion about what constitutes a funny death.
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Jul 4, 2016
#346
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Big Cat's best hot dog strategy is to eat 6-7 dogs immediately to secure a legendary screen cap

You need to get out to a hot start, just like shovel six or seven hot dogs in your mouth at the start. And that way you've got the screen cap for the rest of your life that shows like Dan Katz, eight hot dogs, Joey Chestnut, two.

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Jul 4, 2016·Null
#27127
Big CatBig Cat

The Fourth of July is the drunkest weekend of the year

Fourth of July weekend is maybe the drunkest weekend of the year. Everyone's out. Everyone's summer. It really is like who can drink the most beers all weekend long.

While difficult to prove definitively, Fourth of July is consistently ranked among the top drinking holidays in the US.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

England will beat the Netherlands and then lose a heartbreaking match to Argentina

I think England's gonna win this weekend. And then you'll have the realization that it might not actually be coming home after all... losing to Argentina at that stage, that would be the most heartbreaking loss they could possibly have.

Specific tournament outcome needs verification based on the actual 2026 bracket results.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Christian Pulisic is clearly not and cannot be the face of US soccer

I'm just sick of relying on him [Pulisic] to be the face of US soccer because it can't be, it's so clear that he's not.

This is a subjective evaluation of a player's leadership/status.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The 4-1 loss to Belgium was the worst USMNT performance in years

That was the worst performance from the US that I've seen in years. Just completely lackluster from the start. So much blame to go around. Tim Ream, friend of the program, good guy over the hill, turned into soccer Shawn Bradley before our very eyes got dunked on twice.

Subjective opinion on the quality of the performance.