Luka Doncic is the best player of all time

Is Luka Doncic the best player of all time? Yes. I think so. I think he's going to be—he's really good. Of all time. He's crazy. 42 point triple double.

Antonio Brown will return to the Patriots following his apology to Robert Kraft

Did you see that every single Patriot basically liked it? And he used a semicolon, which means there's a chance that someone wrote it for him, which means that it was like, hey, post this apology. And maybe you'll come back... do you guys think it's a coincidence that after the Patriots' offensive performance on Sunday that this all of a sudden comes very early the next week?

Philip Rivers' career is over

Philip Rivers is done. D-O-N-E, done. D-E-A-D, dead. It's over. I said to myself, this is sad. And I think it might be over. Because there's something about it that feels different. The arm is just not there. And it just can't. It will never come back.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.