Alabama will finish 2018 undefeated and blow everyone out

Everyone in their record books when Alabama finishes an undefeated season and shit kicks everyone. And we'll be like, wait, you could get Alabama at minus 14 in a game in 2018? And you'd be like, that was really stupid. Why didn't we put a billion dollars on it?

The loss to the Saints was a statement loss for the Rams that showed championship resolve

I think that was a statement loss for the Rams. Okay. Because they basically had everything go wrong in the first half... And the way they came out in the second half, even though they didn't win the game, that was championship resolve.

Literally anyone could play quarterback better than Nathan Peterman

I am starting to feel like this is actually cruel that they keep putting [Peterman] out there. Like, Sean McDermott, what are you doing? You can find anyone, basically anyone, and I mean anyone, that could play quarterback better than Nathan Peterman.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.