Championship Sunday is a better weekend of football than the Divisional Round

I have a take, I kind like Championship Sunday the most because I like... there's just something special about booking a trip to the Super Bowl. It's like, feels historic. ... you also get that week where like all the fans of the team that booked it, it's like you don't even have to think about the game. You just get to celebrate it.

CJ Stroud had the best rookie season for a quarterback in NFL history

I called it the best rookie year for a QB ever. And it just, you just ran into an absolute buzz saw [in the Ravens]. ... But at least you know that you have hope now. Like this is a, your window is beginning to open.

The S2 cognition test people are trying to cover their asses regarding CJ Stroud

The S2 cognition test or whatever the fuck it's called... they're literally just trying to cover their ass. Like combine seasons coming up. Once CJ Stroud ended up being incredible and Rookie of the Year and all these things, they have to cover their ass some ways. So they're like, 'Haha, just a prank, it was an incorrect test score and it never should have been counted.'

Getting excited for the NFL schedule release is for pussies

I can't get it up for the schedule release because it's—if you explained what the schedule release was to Vince Lombardi, he'd call you a pussy and spit in your face.

The Preakness Stakes should move its date to three weeks before the Kentucky Derby

Why doesn't the Preakness just say, screw it to the Kentucky Derby and schedule their main race for like three weeks before the Kentucky Derby? You wanna play hardball? Yeah, you could play hardball. I feel like if you, if your horse wins the Preakness, if it was scheduled for before the Derby, you're not skipping the derby. No, you gotta run in the derby.

Little Joe the gorilla forced a trade out of Boston to Pittsburgh

I see from little Joe's perspective, he probably forced this trade. Like little Joe probably demanded a trade so he could go somewhere and start to fuck again. You're getting rid of a locker room case. He's had some issues, some, some character concerns and distraction issues.