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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I am definitively the best Mount Rushmore drafter in the history of the show

I think I'm easily, you know, I'm a humble guy, but I'm pretty far and away the best Mount Rushmore drafter on this show over the years.

This is self-promotion following a notable failure, making it a classic subjective PMT moment.

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Void
Jun 30, 2023
#4930
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

North Carolina is one of the most underrated states in the country and is easily a top-three state overall

I actually think North Carolina is one of the most underrated states. It might be in my top three states overall. It's got everything. Got some very cool places. Asheville, awesome city in the mountains... Great beaches. Great golf. Great basketball.

State rankings are entirely subjective.
Win
Jun 30, 2023
#22978
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

North Carolina is the rightful home of the Wright brothers over Ohio because they actually performed the first flight at Kitty Hawk

For the record, I'm on the side of North Carolina. This is like they did the flight at Kitty Hawk... Ohio's gotta get to the back of the line. It's basically like, oh, their parents had sex in Ohio. They try to count that as a dub.

While both states have historical claims (birthplace vs. flight location), the literal flight happened in NC, making PFT's specific point about location technically correct.
Void
Jun 30, 2023
#4935
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Shohei Ohtani is the best baseball player to ever live

I think we can say Ohtani's the best baseball player to ever live.

While subjective, Ohtani's 2023 season was historically unprecedented, winning him a second unanimous MVP.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.