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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

LeBron James' next social media move will be posting lion quotes to look like an alpha

This is going to end in a couple weeks with LeBron posting like an image of a lion that says 'lions don't concern themselves with the opinions of sheep.' His next post will be him in the gym just being like 'out here grinding, not worrying about Kyrie Irving.'

LeBron famously posted workout videos and motivational/cryptic quotes throughout the 2017 offseason.

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Jul 26, 2017
#4226
Big CatBig Cat

LeBron James is triggered and definitely not enjoying his summer

LeBron James is triggered... When he hashtags 'enjoying my summer', hashtag 'you do the same', that's a pretty telltale sign he is not enjoying his summer. Because you know LeBron probably told someone to tell Stephen A. Smith, 'Hey, I want to beat Kyrie Irving's ass,' and then when it comes out, he goes to Twitter.

The fallout between LeBron and Kyrie led to a trade to Boston shortly after, confirming the tension Big Cat noted.
Loss
Jul 26, 2017
#4228
Big CatBig Cat

Paxton Lynch will excel in Mike McCoy's offensive system

I have the new offensive system guy. I saw this with Paxton Lynch. Mike McCoy is in Denver now. So Paxton Lynch, he's really going to excel because Mike McCoy will let him play out of the shotgun.

Paxton Lynch was a major bust for the Broncos and never excelled under Mike McCoy or anyone else.
Loss
Jul 26, 2017
#4229
HankHank

The Patriots might go undefeated this season

Can the Patriots go undefeated? Okay. A lot of people are saying that. Many people are saying that.

The Patriots went 13-3 in the regular season and lost the Super Bowl to the Eagles.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.