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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Mark Sanchez will be the 'alpha' in the Bears locker room over Mike Glennon

Sanchez is going to be the alpha in that locker room. So that's the situation... You never want to bring in a backup. That's the alpha.

Subjective locker room dynamics, but Glennon was benched after 4 games for Mitch Trubisky, not Sanchez.

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Loss
Mar 24, 2017
#2494
Big CatBig Cat

Kansas is currently the best-looking team in the NCAA tournament

Purdue looked awful in the second half, but also Kansas. I mean, they are the best-looking team right now.

Kansas was the #1 seed and looked dominant, but they lost in the next round (Elite Eight) to Oregon.
Loss
Mar 24, 2017
#2495
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Bill Self and John Calipari having their sons on their teams will provide a great Final Four storyline

One thing that we haven't talked enough shit about Bill Self is the fact that his son's on the team... So I guess we're tracking towards Bill Self's son, John Calipari's son, Final Four... That'll be wonderful. Good storyline.

Neither Kansas nor Kentucky made the Final Four in 2017. Kansas lost in the Elite Eight to Oregon, and Kentucky lost in the Elite Eight to North Carolina.
Win
Mar 24, 2017
#2496
Big CatBig Cat

Oregon is a 'Team of Destiny' because of the Chris Boucher injury

Don't sleep on Oregon because remember, Oregon takes on Michigan's Team of Destiny and Oregon had the big injury to [Chris] Boucher right before this tournament started... when you lose someone, that's a big Team of Destiny situation.

Oregon did make a deep run to the Final Four, validating the 'destiny' narrative to some extent, though they didn't win the title.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.