You aren't in your mid-30s until you're 36

I'm just going to make a motion that your mid-30s doesn't start until you're 36. You're in your early 30s when you're 35.

I would like to make a motion for the show to come out firmly against the coronavirus

I would like for us motion to come out firmly against the coronavirus. Anti-coronavirus. Someone asked for my comment on coronavirus today. I said, not good.

Lanyards are the key to getting into any event

When you have a lanyard, people think you mean something. Like that was really the big key because I flashed it. When you flash a lanyard, people are like, well, that guy knows what he's doing.

The 2026 World Cup final was boring and sucked.

It was boring ass soccer. It sucked. It made me thankful that the World Cup's over, that football's back. Now we can get back into real football, which I'm very, very thankful for. But that was actually, I think that was the best way to end the World Cup, because I'm totally fine with no more soccer now.

Fanatics Fest is a cynical place designed only to take money from fans.

It also seems like the most cynical place ever. Like, you can go to an autograph festival or a fan festival and you know that the guys are being paid to be there. And they're still like, happy to see, interact with you, all that shit. It just seems like every single thing about being at that place is just designed to take money from the people that are there.

Bryson DeChambeau is being targeted by selective rule enforcement.

I think that Bryson definitely did it and it's definitely against the rules. And he got caught for it and they enforced it against him because he's a bad boy. He's had some run-ins before. I don't think the R&A or whatever, I don't think they're particularly happy with Bryson right now.