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Loss
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Michael Jordan needs to be allowed back on the UNC football sidelines with a headset for decision making

I would say maybe Jordan needs to be allowed back on the sidelines headset. Why are you kicking Jordan out of all decision making from the team and then acting surprised when you get the shit kicked out of you by TCU week one?

This is part of a satirical simulation; Michael Jordan is not part of UNC football decision making.

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Sep 2, 2025·Who's Back
#16226
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Charlie Woods cemented himself as the future of golf after his hole-in-one

Charlie Woods is back. He got a hole in one on the third hole at Sawgrass today... Charlie Woods is the future golf. I think he cemented that today.

Charlie Woods is a promising junior golfer but 'cementing' him as the future based on a fictional event is hyperbolic.
Win
Sep 2, 2025
#16218
Big CatBig Cat

I am buying all the Arch Manning stock because it is at an all-time low

I'm not gonna go that far to say I'm actually gonna buy Arch Manning stock because I don't, I really don't know who does well in that situation... I might buy all the Arch stock because it's as low as it possibly could be right now.

Buying Arch Manning stock at the all-time low proved wise. Manning improved throughout the 2025 season, finishing with 2,942 yards, 24 TDs, and an 8-3 record as Texas's starter. His stock rose considerably.
Loss
Sep 2, 2025
#16220
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Alabama is back to being a regular program like it was before Nick Saban

This is going back to Bama. This is what you were before Nick Saban was there. That's what you're gonna be after Nick Saban leaves, unless you find the next Nick Saban.

While Saban's departure is real, Alabama remains a top-tier program in the 2024 reality.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Knicks will sweep the Cavaliers in four games

Yeah. I mean it's, it is over Knicks in four. It's over.

Depends on the outcome of the specific 2026 playoff series.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Victor Wembanyama is a disappointment if he doesn't win seven championships

He has to win a minimum seven championships... has to. If he doesn't, disappointment.

Winning seven rings is nearly impossible in the modern NBA; even one or two would be a success.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Carlos Alcaraz and Jannik Sinner are going to have sex with each other because of their mutual respect

These guys are gonna fuck if they haven't fucked already. Holy shit. They're, they respect each other so much as competitors and as rivals, they're going to fuck each other. It's not even a question.

Inherently unresolvable and based on a fake quote anyway.